Red Hot Steak Lovers Humor: Brought a new grill home last night. She's a real gas and she's really hot, especially after you turn her on!

Q. What is a beef eater's favorite song lyric?
A. My grill, talking 'bout my grill, my grill.

Q. Why did the blonde throw her doll on the grill?
A. She heard it was a Barbie-que.

Q. What spoiled the Labor Day barbecue?
A. When the mosquitoes next door dropped by for a bite.

Q. What happens when a guy with a gas grill and a girl with a smoker fall in love?
A. They live together in holy meatrimony!

Q. What do you get if you cross a doll with some ketchup, honey, mustard and onions in Kansas City?
A. Barbie-que sauce.

Q. What did the cowboy call the first draft of his beefy new barbeque cookbook?
A. A menuscript.

I love dogs! Especially with some BBQ sauce...

Q. How do you host the best backyard BBQ pig roast ever?
A. You go whole hog!

Q. How does a grill master describe a cookout cmpetition held on top of a hill?
A. High steaks.

Q. Why are steaks so happy at barbeques?
A. They get to meet all their old flames.

Seven days without a barbeque makes one weak.

Dear Beef, Hot coals are red, gas flames are blue, but when it comes to meat, all I want is you.

Q. Why was the cannibal cop arrested?
A. He was caught grilling his suspects!

Slogan of a True BBQ Enthusiaist: A good grill master knows how to handle his meat.

Q. What do garden gnomes absolutely love to barbeque out on the grill?
A. Short ribs.

Q. What does a good beef steak hot off the barbeque have in common with sex?
A. They're both very rare.

Q. Who is a grilled T-bone steak's all time favorite movie director?
A. Sizzle B. DeMille.

Q. Which cookout beef steak can see into your future?
A. A Medium.

Q. Why was the well-done BBQ steak's gossip so bad?
A. It wasn't juicy enough.

Q. How do you know how long to leave sweet corn on the BBQ grill?
A. Just play it by ear.

Q. Where do pirates like to cook their ribs and steaks?
A. On the baRRRbecue.

Q. What is a grilled steak pun?
A. A medium where anything well done is rare!

Q. Is it proper to eat BBQ ribs with your fingers?
A. No, fingers should be eaten separately!

Q. What is a beef BBQ lover's favorite song lyric?
A. Is it meat you're looking for?

Q. Do old smokin' barbeque pit masters ever die?
A. No, but they do get burned out.

Luke: What's for dinner, Dad?
Darth: Wookiee steak, but it's a little Chewy.

Q. What does Darth Vader cook up at the backyard barbeque?
A. Sith kebabs.

Q. What is a cow's least favorite Elvis Presley song?
A. Love Meat Tenders.

Q. What did the guy say about his thoroughly cooked steak?
A. Job well done.

Q. What do you call a claim that a hungry man could eat a big T-bone steak hot off the grill in just one minute?
A. Hard to swallow.

Q. What do you call a freezing frankfurter at a 4th of July cookout?
A. A chili dog!

Backyard BBQ Tip of the Day: Never make eye contact with anybody while you're eating a hot dog.

"This hot dog is fantastic," Pat said frankly. (That's what she said!)

Q. When can a hamburger marry a hot dog?
A. After they have a very frank relationship.

Q. What did the mother frankfurter say to the naughty child wiener?
A. Don't be a brat!

Hey, are you lookin' at my wiener?

Q. What did the fired-up grill master say to the vegan?
A. Sorry, I can't listen to your rantings right now, while more important things are at steak.

Today's Bull Sh*t Point to Ponder: Is an argument between two vegans at a cookout still called a beef?

BBQ Trivia of the Day: Did you know that cows are vegetarians so that you don't have to be?

Q. Why did the skeleton go to the backyard barbeque?
A. To get a spare rib.

When two egotists gather at a backyard cookout, it's an I for an I.

Q. How did the jury find the hamburger defendant?
A. Grill-ty as Charred!

Q. Are hamburgers male or female?
A. Male, because they are boygers, not grillgers.

Q. What happens when two hamburgers on the grill fall in love?
A. They live together in holy meatrimony!

Q. Which song do grilled hamburgers sing on the job?
A. Gristle While You Work.

Q. What do the cops say when they arrive during your backyard block party barbeque?
A. Dish is the Police!

The harried hamburger chef was so worried about the grill, that he put everything else on the back burner.

Q. Which patty really likes to over act?
A. Ham-Burger!

Q. How can you stop somebody from stealing food hot off your barbeque grill?
A. With a burger alarm!

Q. What did the hamburger say when it pleaded not guilty?
A. I've been flamed!

Q. Which kind of flame-broiled hamburger can see into your future?
A. A Medium.

Q. What do you call a pig thief who steals your lunch off the grill?
A. A Hamburglar.

Q. Why do the Hamburgers beat the Hot Dogs at every sport they play?
A. Because Hot Dogs are the wurst!

Q. Which Medieval knight really enjoyed cooking outdoors over a fire?
A. Sir Loin.

Q. Why are sizzling grilled steaks such brilliant actors?
A. They give meaty performances, especially if they're prime.

Q. How can you tell if your grilled beef steaks have a high I.Q.?
A. They loin fast.

Q. Do they serve grilled T-bone steaks in Transylvania?
A. Only very rarely.

Q. How do all great backyard cookouts begin?
A. With a meat and greet.

Q. What do grill masters call a phobia of German sausage?
A. Fearing the Wurst!

Q. Why do all hot dogs look the same after coming off the grill?
A. Because they are in bread.

Q. Why are hot dogs so angry, even before they hit the hot grill?
A. Because they're always getting boiled.

Q. Why did the blonde at the Colorado BBQ put a sweater on her hot dog?
A. Because it was a chili dog!

Q. What spoiled the big Fourth of July beef steak BBQ?
A. When the hornets next door buzzed by by for a bite.

A guy wanted to take home the leftovers from the BBQ, but somebody else foiled his plans.

Q. How can you stop somebody from stealing your grill?
A. With a burger alarm!

Q. Which kind of humor always leaves a beef steak cold?
A. Biting wit and gnawing puns!

Q. How do gossipy hamburgers spend their time on the grill?
A. They chew the fat.

Q. What is great about Facebook?
A. It's just super to keep up on all the barbeques you weren't invited to.

Q. What did the grill master say to the vegan?
A. Sorry, I can't listen to your rantings right now, while more important things are at steak.

Thanks for stopping by and see you again soon!

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