Wine lover's humor: I drink wine because I don't like to keep things bottled up!   PainfulPuns.com - Bartender Puns, Beer Jokes, Bar Humor!

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Tasty Wine Humor & Painless Wine Puns
Pick your personal poison from our tasty wine humor, vintage puns, and fine wine jokes!

Wine Jokes, Whiny Puns, Wine Lover's Humor
(Because Sober Jokes Are Too Mainstream and It's Always Happy Hour Here)
Warning: Proceed at your own risk. There is no legal limit on laughter and high spirited jokes.
Wine Humor | 1 | 2 | 3 | Bar Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 |

Wine Lover's Humor: Love the Wine You're With!Wine riddle: Q. What do you call the world's best wine storage room? A. Number one best ellar!Wine Humor: Q. Which breed of dog can bring you a glass of red wine? A. The bordeaux vollie!

Oh no! My wine glass is empty. Somebody call Wine-One-One!

A friend of wine is a friend of mine!

An empty wine bottle is filled with happy memories!

I'm a wine enthusiast. The more wine I drink, the more enthusiastic I get.

Somebody mentioned I could make ice cubes out of leftover wine. I'm confused. What's leftover wine?

My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last. Two time a week, we go to a nice restaurant and have a litle wine and some good food. She goes on Friday, and I go on Saturday.

Wine Humor: Women are like fine wine. They get more expensive with age!Snarky Wine Humor: Some thiings are better left unsaid, but I'll probably drink a glass of wine and say them anyway!Women

Q. What time do ladies drink wine?
A. At Wine O'Clock

Gluten-free, dairy-free, fat-free – I love this new Champagne Diet!

"I cook with food. Sometimes I even add it to the food."
– W.C. Fields

Forgive me, for I have zinned!

I enjoy a glass of wine each night for the health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and stellar dance moves!

Did Marilyn drink Merlot?

Breath-taking wine humorWomen's Wine Joke: What's the difference between a glass of wine and a man? A glass of wine hits the spot every time!Wine Humor: I am a wine enthusiast! The more wine I drink, the more enthusiastic I get!

Wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it.

"Accept what life offers you and try to drink from every cup. All wines should be tasted; some should only be sipped, but with others, drink the whole bottle." – Paulo Coelho

I have joy in my heart and a glass of wine in my hand. A coincidence? I think not.

"Great wine requires a mad man to grow the vine, a wise man to watch over it, a lucid poet to make it, and a lover to drink it."
– Salvador Dali

I told my wife that a man is like fine wine; husbands get better with age. The next day, she locked me in the wine cellar.

Life is too short to drink bad wine.

A tattooed barmaid limerickWine Joke: Have you seen the new sitcom about runk women It's called "Whose Wine Is It Anyway?"Lush Humor: Can you drink alcohol for breakfast? Wine not?

Seven days without wine makes one weak.

"I will drink milk when cows eat grapes." – Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec

I can't wait for the day when I can drink wine with my kids instead of because of them!

"Wine is the most civilized thing in the world." – Ernest Hemingway

Every box of raisins is a tragic tale of grapes that could have become wine.

A meal without wine is called breakfast.

Wine Humor | 1 | 2 | 3 | Bar Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 |

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