Jokes, Whiskey Puns, Wry Rye Humor
a shot of bourbon humor, redeye likker laughs, corny hooch puns and Scotch
Proceed Cautiously! Aged whiskey jokes, hooch humor, white lightning
laughs and rotgut puns ahead.
Whiskey Jokes, Hooch Humor, Scotch Puns
(Because Moonshine Jokes and
Mountain Dew Puns Are TOO Mainstream While You're
Enjoying a Bottle of Jack!)
| Wry Whiskey Jokes | Spirited
Liquor Puns | Vodka Jokes | Cocktail
LOLs | 2 | 3
| Drunk Puns |
| Cold Beer Jokes | Ale-ful
Colorado Craft Beer Puns | Beer
IS Better Than... | Bartender
| Wine Jokes | Ladies
Night Bar Jokes | Man Drinking Jokes
| Scary Drink Puns | Holiday
| Sports Bar Jokes | Animal
Walks Into a Bar Jokes | Sci-Fi Space
Bar Puns | Bar Pick-Up Lines
What do you get if you cross Vincent Van Gogh with George
A. One bourbon, one scotch, and one ear.
guys were hanging at the bar. First guy says, "My wife
is just like whiskey." Second guy comments, "Oh,
she gets better with age?" "No," replies
the first guy, "She gives me a headache."
Why does whiskey come in fifths?
A. 'Cause that's what you need when you're feeling two
What is the difference between whiskey and a battery?
A. The battery has a negative side.
Tip of the Day: If you want a promotion at work, just walk
around your office yelling, "Vodka! Tequila! Jack
Daniels!" This makes you the one who calls the
Wisdom of he Day: When life gives you lemons, make whiskey
guy was browsing at the liquor store, so the clerk asked,
"Do you need help?" The guy replied, "Yes,
but I'm here to get whiskey instead."
What happens when a ghost drinks too much Tennessee whiskey?
A. It ends up sheet faced!
Why did the Kentucky entrepreneur decide not to open a new
A. Because that's a whiskey business.
Why shouldn't you drink whiskey while you do calculus?
A. Because it's against the law to drink and derive.
Hour Point to Ponder: Drinking Jack Daniels might not be
the solution to your problems, but it's worth a shot!
KaPow! What does Batman put in his whiskey?
Point to Ponder: If you ask a liquor store clerk to help
you find the good Scotch, does that make him your spirit
Why was the redneck who liked to shoot guns and drink whiskey
all bummed out?
A. Because he was all out of shots.
Wisdom of the Day: Whiskey may not be the answer, but it's
surely worth a second shot.
Point to Ponder: If an alchoholic gets whiskey dick, does
a heroine user get poppycock?
finest Scotch, please." So the guy at Staples hands
me a 12-year-old roll of tape...
What did the guy say when the bartender asked if he wanted
his Wild Turkey without ice?
A. Sure, that'd be neat!
SEO expert walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a
quick shot of whiskey, bourbon, Jack Daniels, Jim Beam,
Seagrams 7, Jameson... Yeah, he walked out drunk,
blitzed, blasted, tipsy, intoxicated, inebriated, two sheets
to the wind, f-ed up, stoned, fried, zoned, sloshed...
Point to Ponder: If you drink half a bottle of whiskey,
is the bottle half empty or half full? That doesn't matter
because you're fully loaded.
the bartender asked the patron if he wanted his whiskey
without ice, the guy replied, "Sure, that would be
Who wrote the whiskeyed-up book, Town Drunks Of The
A. Sal Oon.
Why is whiskey better than a woman?
A. Whiskey never has a headache, although it may give you
a headache in the morning.
fish walks into a bar and orders a Scotch and water, and
tells the bartender: "Hold the Scotch, and bring it
in a large bowl."
How are the French Revolution and Prohibition alike?
A. Both got rid of Bourbons.
What is Whiskey Wednesday?
A. It's like Meatless Monday and Taco Tuesday, but for badasses!
Fun Fact of the Day: Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary.
So I looked it up on Whiskeypedia and learned if
you drink too much, it's likely tequil-ya!
What is a worst-case rescue scenario?
A. The Saint Bernard arrives with an empty keg around his
How do women and whiskey age alike?
A. The packaging gets a little messed up, but the stuff
inside stays pretty much the same.
What happened when a guy met a drunk ventriloquist at the
A. She said she wanted to sleep with him, but he didn't
know if it was her or Jim Beam doing the talking.
How do you get a computer drunk?
A. Give it screen shots of whiskey!
you hear about the guy who couldn't decide between vodka
and whiskey? He was very good at multi-flasking.
Wry Whiskey Jokes | Spirited
Liquor Puns | Vodka Jokes | Cocktail
Jokes | 2 | 3
| Drunk Puns |
Why did the alcoholic keep switching between vodka and whiskey?
A. He was great at multi flasking.
How does whiskey turn you into Cinderella?
A. You leave the house looking fine and spend the night
dancing away, but by the end of the night, you're a hot
mess missing a shoe.
Wisecrack of he Day: Redbull may give you wings, but whiskey
gives you balls.
What might open the gates to Heaven?
you hear about the guy who quit drinking whiskey for good?
Now he drinks for evil.
on a whiskey diet. I think I've lost three days already...
Asshole Words of the Day: I like my women like I like my
whiskey – light brown, from the South, and kept in
a lightless cabinet only to be taken out on special occasions.
What's the difference between a beautiful gown and a bottle
A. The gown can make one girl look gorgeous, but the whiskey
can make all the ladies look lovely.
What should you do with an old inventory of Kentucky Bourbon?
A. Liquidate it, one mellow sip at a time.
Why didn't the entrepanuer in Tennessee open his dream distillery?
A. 'Cause his accountant said that was a whiskey business
How does a cannibal prefer his whiskey?
A. With a taste of Pete.
What did the blonde say after somebody told her to drink
A. Duh! I can't find that brand anywhere!
Which Tom Cruise film was boycotted by moonshiners in Apalachia?
A. Whiskey Business.
Which brand of barley-based brew was named after a world-renowned
A. Malt Disney.
How do you make the perfect martini?
A. Dump the gin, vermouth, and olives in the trash where
they belong, and open a bottle of Jack Daniels!
| Beer Jokes | 2
| 3 | 4
| Colorado Craft Beer Jokes | Beer
IS Better! | Bartender
Puns | 2 | 3
| Wine Jokes, Vino Puns | 2
| 3 | Ladies
Night Bar Jokes | Man Drinking Jokes,
Guy In a Bar LOLs |
| Cocktail Jokes | 2
| 3 | Spirited
Liquor Puns | Vodka Jokes | Wry
Whiskey Jokes | Drunk Puns |
| Sports Bar Jokes, Sport Drinking Puns
| Scary Cocktail Jokes, BOOze
Puns | Alchoholic Jokes |
| Animal Walks Into the Bar Jokes
| Space Bar Puns | Drunken
Holiday Grins | Drunken Gnomes
| Beverage Jokes | Soda
Funny Soft Drink Jokes | Coffee Puns,
Java Jokes, Espresso Humor | 2
| Waiter Jokes | Restaurant
Jokes | Pizza Puns | Burger
Jokes | Hot Dog Humor | Snack
You've toasted along this far,
so here's another shot of laughter,
redeye humor and oaky
painful puns that'll surly lift
Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...
Arrested Laughs | Blonde
Jokes | Broncos Jokes |
Canadian Jokes | Chef
Puns | Colorado Jokes | Ghost
| Head Jokes | Hipster
Humor | Musician Jokes | Pirate
Jokes | Poker Jokes | Police
Jokes | Redneck Laughs |
| Religion Jokes | Saturday
Puns | Sci-Fi Jokes | Sports
Jokes | Superman Jokes | Weed
Jokes | Woman Jokes |
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