What do you call commercials shown during the summer and
winter global games?
Who authorred the new book, How To Win the Olympics?
A. Vic Torry.
Why couldn't the olympian listen to music?
A. Because he broke the record!
Who wrote the winning new book titled, The Olympic Trials?
A. Will Lee Qualify.
Why won't Cinderella ever medal at the Olympics?
A. She has a pumpkin for a coach, plus she runs away
from the ball.
Why wasn't sunbathing a sport in ancient Greece?
A. 'Cause the best you could get is a bronze.
Why did the Olympian put her gold medals on display before
A. First things first.
Pick-Up Line: You must
be a track star because you've been running through my mind
What do you call guys who just monkey around at the gym?
only exercise I've done this month is running out of money.
Wisecrack: Remember, your brain needs exercise, too. So,
spend lots of time thinking up excuses not to work out.
Pick-Up Line: Hey girl,
let's do lunge!
you realize that Dr. Frankenstein was actually the first
Which extreme sports adventure author never finished writing
the book, My Last White River Rafting Trip?
A. Watt R. Fall.
Which extreme sport do pumpkins enjoy?
A. Bungee-gourd jumping.
pun readers suffer in agony, as well. Ouch!
What did the blonde runner drink when she was in last place?
you hear about the blonde marathon runner who ran for an
hour, but only ran two feet? Well, Duh! She only had two
Who was the absolute fastest runner of all time?
A. Adam. He was the first in the human race.
Why did the fencer lose to his rival again?
A. He was foiled again.
How did the acupuncturist heal the wounded fencer?
A. With an epee cure.
Do old archers ever die?
A. No, but sometimes they bow and quiver.
What is a foot surgeon's favorite Olympic sport?