Gym Joke: My struggle with steroids has only made me stronger!   PainfulPuns.com - Puns, Jokes, Word Play, Groaners, Ouch!

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Hulk Asks: Why did Arnold Schwarzenegger train on a desert island? A. He Wanted Maximum Isolation!
Gym Pick-Up Line: If I said you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
Q. What did the bodybuilder say when he opened his protein tub? A. No whey!
When I came out of te gym, a cop asked me where I got that body. I said, "I don't know, I just opened the trunk and whe was there!"
Gym Pick-Up Line: Is your body from McDonald's? 'Cause I'm Lovin' It!
Q. Why wasn't the bodybuilder evicted? A. Because he was squatting!
Hulk Says: When Chuck Norris finishes his workout, the gym takes a break!

 


Bodybuilder Puns, Ripped Humor, Muscleman Jokes
Get pumped up with physique puns, hardbody humor, weightlifting jokes and ripped laughs.

Bodybuilder Jokes, Pec Puns, Weightlifter Humor
(Because Weightlifting Jokes and Pumped Up Puns Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream If You're Looking for a 6-Pack!)
Warning: Press Onward at Your Own Risk! Weighty jokes, chiseled humor, ripped laughs and pec-ish puns ahead.
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Q. What's another name for exercise? A. The Joy of Flex!Hulk Asks: What do you get if you cross a body builder and a peeping Tom? A. Amazing Peeks!Q. Why did the bodybuilder cross the road? A. He didn't. There's no walking on leg day!

Gym Factoid: Did you realize that Dr. Frankenstein was actually the first bodybuilder?

Q. Why didn't any of the bodybuilders laugh at the Painful pre-workout Pun?
A. 'Cause it was a bit of a stretch.

Q. What did the bodybuilder say when his girlfriend dumped him for some other gym rat?
A. I'm feelin' the burn.

Workout Wisecrack: I would tell you a bodybuilder joke, but you'll have to weight for it...

Q. What makes a bodybuilder smile at the gym?
A. Face muscles!

Bodybuilder Tip of the Day: Before every workout, always warm up with at least 10 reps of selfies to both Facebook and Twitter.

Q. Why did the blonde bodybuilder change her workout clothes?
A. Somebody said she was ripped.

Q. Why did the redneck bodybuilder wear a sleeveless shirt to the gym?
A. To exercise his right to bear arms.

Bulking Up Tip of the Day: If anabolic steroids cause erectile dysfunction, just say NO to drugs!

Q. What did the newbie at the gym say to the female bodybuilder twins?
A. Those really are super sets.

Bodybuilder Joke of the Day: Gymnasium means naked exercise in ancient Greek. But don't try that line on the health club receptionist, unless you've seen an ode to her on an urn!

Bodybuilder Trainer Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, go ahead and grab my EZ Bar.

Q. What do you call a donkey on steroids? A. An ass-teroid!The bodybuilder knew he was in love after experiencing strong feelings!Hulk Asks: Why did the bodybulder go to the hospital? A. Somebody told him he was all cut up!

Q. What do sick British bodybuilders do on the loo?
A. Drop sets.

Q. What does a bodybuilder do for cardio?
A. He lifts weights faster.

Q. Why did the bodybuilder go to the crustacean church at the beach?
A. It was a great source of mussel mass.

Q. Why did the bodybuilder get stopped by the police?
A. The cops said it was illegal to carry those guns in public.

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, going to a sculpture class won't even get you this chiseled.

Pumped Up Pick-Up Line: Girl, I followed my heart, and it led me to the gym.

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Do you believe in love at first set? Or, should I curl this barbell another 10 times?

Q. Why did Chuck Norris take a rest day?
A. To give the weights a day off.

Q. Why doesn't Chuck Norris lift weights?
A. Because that implies there are limits to his strength.

Q. Why did the bodybuilder buy tape from the hardware store? A. Somebody told him he was ripped!Gym Joke: Gnome body builders are not ab-gnormal!Q. How many bodybuilders does it take to change a light bulb? A. Three. One to do it and two to chant "You're looking huge man, huge."

Q. Why did the newbie weightlifter get fed up and quit the gym?
A. Because his name is Max and he really hated all the jokes.

Bodybuilder Chat Up Line: Hey big guy, you sure look swole!

Q. What do buff chickens work on at the gym?
A. Their pecks!

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, are you thirsty? 'Cause I've got a six-pack right here.

Funny Fitness Factoid: Most of the men and women at the gym are working toward one goal: The Perfect Female Body!

Q. Why did the oyster decide to go to the gym?
A. Because that's really good for the mussels.

Q. What did the gym newbie say to the bodybuilder who lifted until he couldn't even budge one more rep?
A. You're a failure.

Q. What does a bodybuilder repeat in his mind while he deadlifts?
A. Don't fart, don't fart, don't fart...

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, you've hit your plateau, but damn it would be hard to top you.

Would-Be Bodybuilder: I want to impress a girl. Which machine should I use?
Gym Trainer: Try the ATM outside.

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, my weights are all free.

Q. Why did the stupid bodybuilder train at the zoo? A. He wanted to get ripped to shreds!Q. How does a physicist exercise? A. By pmping ion!Just Say Gnome to Steroids!

Q. Which kinds of vegetables are into weight liftting?
A. Muscle sprouts.

Q. How did the bodybuilder know he was finally the hottest guy at the gym?
A. He had a fever of 102º.

Q. What was Dracula's title after he won the bodybuilding competition over his bloody stiff competitors?
A. The Champ-ire!

Q. What do you call guys who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons.

Q. Why are chemistry labs good for a workout?
A. They can make you buffer.

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey there, did you get that body at McDonald's? 'Cause of that Big Mac, my macros are all over the place.

Gnome bodybuilders strive for keyed muscle tone, worked out moves babes can't resist, and pun perfection.

Q. Why couldn't the bodybuilder be evicted from his apartment?
A. 'Cause he was squatting.

Q. What is it called when a rapper goes to the gym for a quick workout?
A. A Lil' Pump.

Q. What do you say to a bodybuilding cow farmer? A. Show us your calves!Q. Which exercise do hairdressers do at the gym? A. Curls!Q. What do you call Santa Claus with muscles? A. Mr. Xmass!

Bodybuilder Point to Ponder: Why don't some people exercise their mind as much as they exercise their body?

Q. What do you call a bodybulider with a sunburn?
A. Flecks Wheeler.

Bodybuilder Trainer Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, I hope you didn't forget your jelly for today's workout.

Ripping Fitness Philosophy Failure: I've accepted the fact that being cremated is the only way I'll ever have a smokin' hot body.

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey hottie, how'd you like to work in a few reps over at my place?

Q. Which Aussies were the first to concentrate on working out their ab muscles?
A. The native Ab-Originals.

Q. Why did the fish stop lifting weights?
A. He pulled a mussel.

Q. Why do impatient people detest going to the gym?
A. 'Cause of all the weights.

Q. What does Bigfoot do for exercise?
A. Sas-squats!

Did you hear about the bodybuilder who took part in the sun tanning event at the Olympics? He only got the bronze.

Q. Where do alien bodybuilders go for a good workout on Earth?
A. Planet Fitness.

The best activities for your health are pumping and humping.
– Arnold Schwarznegger

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