Q. How do you compliment a donkey? A. "Hay, nice ass!"   PainfulPuns.com - Animal Puns, Farm Humor, Clucking Funny Jokes!

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Q. What do you call a donkey on steroids? A. An ass-teroid!

 


Horse Humor, Donkey Puns, Horsey Jokes
Hay, it's a stable supply of horse puns, mule jokes, ass humor and horsing around!

Horse Jokes, Donkey Humor, Stable Puns
(Because City Jokes and Metropolitan Puns Are Too Mainstream for Bad Asses and Hipster Horses)
Warning: Horses Present. Watch Where You Walk! The smell isn't the most painful thing here.
| Farmer | Goose and Duck | Horse 1 | 2 | 3 | Pig 1 | 2 | 3 | Sheep |

Q. Who wond the cowboy's chess match? A. It ended in a drawl!Fun FarmSaying: A Horse is a Very Stable Animal.I put a bet on a horse to come in at 10 to 1, and it did! But, all the others came in at 12:30!

Q. Which street do horses live on?
A. Mane Street!

Q. Why did the horse talk with hay in its mouth?
A. It lacked good stable manners

Q. Why did the horse cross the road?
A.
Because somebody shouted, "Hay!"

Q. What do you call an equine that wears condoms?
A. Trojan Horse

Q. What do race horses eat?
A. Fast Food

Q. Why don't race horses wear underwear?
A. Because it rides up on them.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender confuses idioms with jokes and offers him a glass of water, but he ca't make him drink it!Q. What do you call a baby donkey? A. A Burrito!Q. What did one horse say to another? A. The pace is familiar, but I can't remember the mane!

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Hey." Horse says, "Yes please. And can I get a beer with that?"

Bag of fertilizer walks into a bar. Bartender says, "You can come in, but don't give me any sh*t."

Q. What happens when you buy a mini donkey?
A.
You get a little ass

Q. What do you get if you cross a donkey and a motorcycle?
A. A Yam-Hee-Haw

Q. What does it mean when you find a horseshoe?
A. Some poor horse is walking around in his socks.

Q. Where do horses shop?
A. Old Neigh-vy

Q. What do you call a donkey that throws nuts to the moon? A. An ass-throw-nut!Q. What do you dall a veterinarian with laryngitis? A. Hoarse DoctorQ. When do vampires like horse racing? A. When it's neck & neck!

Q. What do you call a donkey with a Ph.D?
A. A smart ass!

Q. What do you get if a donkey eats a porcupine?
A. A pain in the ass.

Q. What did the horse say when it fell?
A. I've fallen and I can't giddyup!

Q. Why did the farmer ride his horse into town?
A. It was too heavy to carry.

Q. Where do horses get their hair done?
A. Maine

Q. Why did a pony have to gargle?
A. It was a little hoarse.

Q. Why do horses fart when they buck? A. Because they can't acheive full horse power without gas!Q. What do you get if you cross an optometrist convention and a donkey auction? A. Two eye-gl-asses for the price of one!Q. How does a cowboy get his horse to do odd jobs around the ranch? A. He pays hin under the stable!

Q. When does a horse talk?
A. Whinny wants to!

Q. What kind of bakery does a horse like?
A. Thoroughbread

Q. What do you call a donkey with a banjo?
A. Bluegr-ass

Q. What do donkeys send out at Christmas time?
A. Mule-tide greetings.

Q. What do you call a noisy horse?
A. A herd animal!

Q. What's the difference between a horse and the weather?
A. One is reined up, and the other rains down.

| Farmer | Goose and Duck | Horse 1 | 2 | 3 | Pig 1 | 2 | 3 | Sheep |
| Chicken 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Cow 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Beef 1 | 2 |
Fun on the Farm Humor: | Funny Farm | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |


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