Q. What do you call a pig that's wrong? A. Mistaken Bacon!   PainfulPuns.com - Animal Puns, Farm Humor, Clucking Funny Jokes!

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Recently, a pig invited me to see his new home. Actually, it was quite stylish!
Q. What do you call a pig thief? A. A Hamburglar!
Q. What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon? A. Pork Rinds!
Q. What do you get if you cross a dinosaur and a pig? A. Jurassic Pork!
Q. Where do swine go to vacation? A. Tro-pig-cal islands!

 


Hog Jokes, Pig Humor, Boarly Funny Puns
Wallow in boaring jokes, sloppy pig humor, porker puns, sty laughs and humor to hog heaven.

Pig Puns, Swine Humor, Sloppy Sow Jokes
(Because Bacon Jokes, Porker Humor, and Hammy Puns Are TOO Mainstream for Stylish Pigs and Hog Hipsters!)
Warning: Pigs Present. Watch Where You Muck Around! The pig slop isn't the most painful thing ahead.
| Pig Jokes | 2 | 3 | Baad Sheep Puns | Horse Humor | Donkey Jokes, Ass Puns | Broncos Jokes |
| Cow Puns | Cow On the Moon | Bull Puns | Cowboy Jokes, Rancher Puns | Dairy Farm Humor |
| Funky Chicken Jokes | Rooster Puns | Fun On the Farm | Farm Crime LOLs | Farm Music Jokes |

Q. What do you get if you cross a pig and a cactus? A. A Porky Pine!Q. Why did the pig quit sun bathing? A. He was bacon in the heat! Q. What do you call a pig that wins the lottery? A. Filthy Rich!

Q. What do you call a pig with no legs?
A. A Groundhog!

Q. Why shouldn't you ever tell a pig a secret?
A. Because they always squeal!

Q. Why are pig puns so funny and interesting?
A. 'Cause there's always a twist in the tale!

Q. Why did the pig go to a casino?
A. She wanted to play the slop machines.

Q. Why shouldn't you share your bed with a pig?
A. Because they hog the covers!

Q. What do swine use to chat up a date?
A. Pig-Up Lines!

Q. What is a pig's favorite color?
A. Mahogany!

Q. Why did the pig join the army?
A. He heard the food was a mess.

Q. What do you call a large pig that's absolutely no fun to be around?
A. A Big Boar!

Q. Which kind of social gatherings do pigs like the most?
A. Sow-prise parties!

Q. Which swine was the most famous artist of the 20th Century?
A. Pigcasso.

Q. Why was the pig ejected from the football game? A. For Playing Dirty!Q. Which magazine do the three little pigs read? A. Porks Illustrated!Q. What would happen if pigs cuold fly? A. The price of bacon would skyrocket!

Q. Why are pigs such great football fans?
A. Because they're always rooting.

Q. Why did the athletic pig lose the race?
A. He pulled his hamstring.

Q. Why did the pig cross the road?
A. Because he was boared.

Q. Why did it take the pig hours to cross the road?
A. Because he was a slow pork!

Q. If cows carry ecoli and chickens carry salmonella, what do pigs carry?
A. A gun, a badge, and a get out of jail free card.

Q. Why are books about pigs always so interesting?
A. Because there's always a twist in the tail!

Q. What kind of neckwear does a boar dress in for a business meeting?
A. A Pig's Tie.

Q. Where are habitual criminal pigs sent?
A. To the Pen.

Q. What is the favorite ballet of pigs?
A. Swine Lake!

Q. What do you get if there's an explosion at a hog farm?
A. Bacon bits.

Q. What do you call fake pig news?
A. A lot of hogwash!

Q. Which Painful Puns do pigs enjoy the most?
A. The corniest ones!

Q. What do you get if you cross a horse and a pig?
A. A Neighboar.

Q. Why did the farmer name his pig "Ink?"
A. Because it always ran out of the pen!

Q. Why was the hog farmer considering changing careers?
A. 'Cause the job was a real boar.

Q. Why did the farmer make the pigs do paperwork? A. Because it was grunt work!Q. What do pigs call the creatoin of the universe A. The Pig Bang!Q. What happened when the pig pen broke? A. They switched to a pencil!

Q. Which pig was the smartest in all of history?
A. Albert Ein-swine.

Q. What do you get if you cross a pig with a frog?
A. A Ham-Phibian!

Q. What do you get if you cross a pig and a millipede?
A. Bacon and legs.

Q. If wild pigs could live anywhere in the world, where would they choose?
A. Boar-a Boar-a.

Q. Which Star Wars character was actually a pig?
A. Ham Solo.

Q. What do you call a wild boar caught in a forest fire?
A. Smoked sausage.

Q. How do pigs communicate with each other?
A. They use swine language!

Q. What was the most coveted pig award Eva in the 1960s?
A. The Arnold Ziffel.

Q. How do pigs write messages?
A. With invisible oink!

Q. What do you name an extremely sly pig?
A. Cunningham.

Q. Which pig actor starred in a movie about Frankenswine?
A. Boaris Karloff.

Q. Where do pigs go to get together?
A. To the meat market.

Q. Why did the cops arrest a fellow pig?
A. Because he was a pigpocket.

Q. How do you fit more pigs on a farm? A. Build a styscraper!Q. What do pig sailors yell when they stop the ship? A. Oinkers Aweigh!Q. Which sport was invented by pigs? A. Mud Wrestling!

Q. Why were the pigs so proud of their new home?
A. Because it was quite stylish!

Q. Which fruity alcoholic beverages do pigs like to gulp down?
A. Swine coolers.

Q. Which US president is a pig's favorite?
A. AbraHAM Lincoln!

Q. Why was the pig serving time in jail?
A. For being a swine-dler.

Q. Which pig always wear perfume?
A. Calvin Swine.

Q. How do you host the best pig roast ever?
A. You go whole hog!

Q. What do you call a pig that weaves all over the highway?
A. A Road Hog!

Q. What do you call it when a pig tells tall tales?
A. Hogwash.

Q. Do old pig farmers ever die?
A. No, but they do get rather disgruntled.

Q. How do you make it the best pig roast ever?
A. You go hog wild!

Q. How many animals can fit into a pair of pantyhose?
A. Ten little piggies, two calves, one ass, one beaver and several thousand hares.

Q. What did the pig say when a wolf grabbed his tail?
A. "That's the end of me!"

Wanna hear a clean swine joke? Two pigs took a bath together...

Q. On which February holiday do pigs elect their new leader?
A. Crowned Hog Day!

Q. Why are piggy banks so wise?
A. 'Cause they're filled with common cents.

Q. What is the number one pig pick-up line?
A. Wanna be pen pals?

Q. Which brand of underwear do stylish pigs prefer?
A. Calvin Swine!

| Pig Jokes | 2 | 3 | Baad Sheep Puns | Farm Crime LOLs and Cow Cop Jokes | Farm Music Jokes |
| Cow Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Cow On Moon | Bull Puns | Beefy Humor | Ranch Puns, Cowboy Jokes |
| Horse Jokes, Pony Puns | 2 | 3 | Donkey Jokes, Ass Puns | Broncos Jokes | Animal Poop Puns |
| Chicken Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Chicken Cross the Road | Rooster Puns | Goose Jokes | Duck Puns |
| Farmer Jokes | Farmer's Market Jokes | Farm Crop Puns | Fun On the Farm | Dairy Farm Jokes |
| Farm Animal Astronaut Jokes | Garden Animal LOLs | Animal Pick-Up Lines | Wild Animal Jokes |
| Animal Music Jokes | Pet Puns | Sports Animal Jokes | Party Animal Puns | Xmas Animal Puns |
| Farm Jokes and Farm Animal Humor | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Farm Pick-Up Lines |


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This little piggy has lasted thus far, so here's even more hammy humor,
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