Q.
Why was the farmer so teffified by his pumpkins?
A. Because after he watered the seeds, they grew some
and then grew some more!
Q.
What does a gourd grower use to mend his torn overalls?
A. A pumpkin patch.
Q.
Who is the leader of the big orange autumn gourds?
A. The pump-king.
Q.
How does a pumpkin feel growing out in the pumppkin patch?
A. Just vine,
Q.
Why were the pumpkins that grew up out in the garden patch
lifelong friends?
A. 'Cause they had deep roots.
Q.
What happened to the guy who was hit by a 200-pound catapulted
gourd during Pumpkin Chunkin?
A. He was squashed. SPLAT!
Q.
What are big, orange Halloween gourds truly afraid of?
A. Things that go pumpkin the night.
Q.
What is an overweight gourd called?
A. A plump-kin.
Q.
What do you say to compliment a vegetable gardener?
A. Smashing Pumpkins! |
Q.
Why did the blonde farmer plant each potato in a paper lunch
bag?
A. She wanted to keep the dirt out of their eyes!
Q.
What does a farmer do to convince a potato to do what he
wants?
A. Just butter him up!
Q.
What does a farmer call a red potato that tries to pass
as a tomato?
A. An imi-tater!
Q.
Which kind of farm crop needs to wear glasses?
A. A spec-tater.
Q.
Why did the blonde farmer drive a steam roller through her
Idaho spud field right before Thanksgiving?
A. 'Cause she was growing mashed potatoes.
Q.
Which kind of potato is always looking for a fight?
A. An agi-tater!
Q.
What does a farmer call a potato that doesn't want to get
into hot water?
A. Hez-a-tater.
Q.
What do potatoes wear to bed?
A. Their yammies.
Q.
What do farmers call lazy spuds?
A. Couch potatoes. |
Q.
Which will win the salad race: the lettuce, a faucet, or
a tomato?
A. The lettuce is a head, the faucet is still running, and
the tomato will eventually ketchup.
Q.
Why did the Alabama farmer plant yeast in his field?
A. So the South can rise again!
Q.
Why did an ear of corn, a head of cabbage, a carrot and
cucumber all jump into the ocean?
A. 'Cause they're all C foods.
Q.
Why was the corn ordering the cabbage around?
A. 'Cause it was the Kernel.
Q.
Why did the farmer's corn wrongly get sent to jail?
A. For stalking the sweet peas.
Q.
Who is the father of really bad veggie jokes?
A. Pop Corn!
Q.
How are some farmers cruel?
A. They pull corn by the ears!
Q.
Why do potatoes argue so much?
A. They just can't see eye to eye!
Q.
How do corn farmers decorate at Christmas time?
A. They hang stalkings from the fireplace mantel. |