Why was the librarian given the Lifetime Achievement Award?
A. 'Cause she had a storied career.
What do librarians take with them when they go fishing?
A. Book Worms!
How is the library like the hooker standing on the corner
A. Both are open to the public.
a Librarian Line: Hey girl, are you my favorite book? 'Cause
when I look at you, I touch my shelf.
What did the librarian say when her shift was over?
A. Time to Book!
What did the library cop say when the guy didn't pay the
A. I'm gonna have to book ya.
What did the chemist say when he escaped the police?
A. Cu later, Copper!
How often do you come across really smart and funny chemistry
A. Only periodically.
Why didn't the smart student ever drink water while studying
A. Because water decreases concentration!
What happened after the chemistry teacher threw Sodium Chloride
at a student?
A. She was arrested because that's a salt.
English teacher asked a smart ass student to name two pronouns.
The student replied, "Who, Me?"
What does a mallard use to do math?
A. A quack-ulator.
Which are the smartest letters of the alphabet?
What do you call a school kid with a dictionary in his pants
A. Smartie Pants!
Why did so few folks read the Dachshund's autobigraphy?
A. Because it was such a long story.