Q. What do you call it when a weatherman predicts wind speeds? A. Best gust-imates!   PainfulPuns.com - Puns, Jokes, Word Play, Groaners, Ouch!

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Q. Why was the evening weatherman so worried? A. He was afraid the new meteorologist would steal his thunder!
Q. Why is wind power so popular? A. Because it has a lot of fans!
Q. What did the tree say to the wind? A. Leaf me alone!
Horse says: You might be from Colorado if an avalance is coming and you're wearing Broncos blinders!
When taking your car out in inclement weather, always make sure it's driving rain!

Hey Gnirl, I'm no weatherman, but you can expect a few inches tonight!

 


Colorado Weather Jokes, Hail Humor, Sunny Puns
Map out Denver weather forecast humor, wacky atmospheric puns, and hail NO jokes.

Denver Weather Forecast Humor: It Snow Joke!
(Because Predictable Weather Jokes and Hail-ish Comedy Could Never Be Too Mainstream in Stormy Colorado)
Warning: Venture outdoors at your own risk. Stormy Jokes, Sunny Puns, and Hail-Areas Humor Ahead.
| Colorado Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | Denver | 2 | 3 |
| You Might Be From Colorado If... | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Tourism | Mountains | 2 | 3 |
| Weather | 2 | 3 | Nightlife | Craft Beer | Munchies | Dogs | Wildlife | 2 | 3 | Sasquatch | 2 |
| Colorado Sports | Go Broncos! | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Colorado Cannabis | Mile High Humor |

Colorado Fact: If you don't like the weaterh, just wait five minutes!You might be from Colorado if ou dress in shorts and flip flops because the weaterh forecast is 50!Colorado Wisdom: If you don't like the weather, just wait five minutes, and don't stand on top of a mountain during a thunder storm!

Q. Why did the Colorado weather want privacy?
A.
Because it was changing.

Q. Which TV weather forecast feature do Colorado potheads like best?
A. The Highs.

Q. Why do NOAA Boulder weather forecast models suffer from depression?
A. They're told they're unattractive and wrong much of the time.

Q. What do you call a wet bear in Colorado?
A.
A drizzly bear.

Q. What does a Colorado storm cloud wear under its raincoat?
A.
Thunderwear!

Did you hear about the unfortunate Colorado weather chaser who recently died? His last photos of lightning were really quite striking, though.

Q. When does it rain money in Colorado?
A.
When there's a change in the weather.

Q. How does a Colorado hail stone describe its life?
A.
It has a lot of ups and downs.

Q. Why did the Denver weather forecaster move to a different climate?
A. Because the weather didn't agree with him.

You might be from Colorado if hail freaks you out so bad that you have a hard time getting a cab!Colorado Wisdom: If you don't like the weather, just wait five minutes, and take cover in the lowest spot during a thunder storm!Q. What do you call it when high winds ruin your outdoor event? A. Uninvited gusts!

Q. What did the Colorado hail storm say to the roof?
A.
Hang onto your shingles 'cause this isn't ordinary sprinkles.

In Colorado, if you don't get hit by lightning or hail, you might as well just go along with the flow.

Did you hear about the two Colorado weathermen who both broke an arm and a leg in a storm-chasing accident? They called in from the hospital about the four casts!

You're having a great summer in Colorado if: You have NOT had to utter the phrase, What the Hail!

Q. What is today's Colorado weather forecast?
A.
Chili today, hot tamale.

Q. Where do Colorado meteorologists stop on their way home after a busy weather day at work?
A.
The Isobar.

You might be exercising outdoors in Colorado if high gusts are bothering you. And, you might be in Boulder if high guests bother you. You might be outside a pot shop, if nothing bothers you.

Q. What is the meteorological term for when high pressure goes on vacation to Colorado?
A. HIatus.

Q. Can bees fly in the rain?
A. Not without their yellow jackets.

You might be from Colorado if you think "humid" is anything over 25%!Q. Where do you go in Denver if there's a tornado? A. The field at Mile High. They never get touchdowns there...You might be from Colorado if you think a blizzard in May is totally normal!

Q. What did one Colorado raindrop say to the other?
A.
Two's company. Three's a cloud.

Q. What did the cloud say to the lightning bolt?
A.
You're shocking.

Q. Why shouldn't you bother fighting with a Colorado thundercloud?
A. He'll just go and storm off.

Q. Where do hail stones go on a date?
A. To Hell!

Q. Why do the Denver Broncos have two mascots, Thunder and Miles?
A. To distract the fans from any horsing around during the game.

Did you notice after Colorado legalized marijuana, nobody knows the name of the Broncos stadium – and nobody is surprised by the crazy weather?

Colorado Weather Point to Ponder: Why do they call it Right As Rain, if you're all wet?

It was so cold in Colorado yesterday that even the politicians stopped blowing hot air.

Q. Where do snowmen keep their money?
A. In a snow bank.

Did you hear about the Colorado snow storm that arrived at just the right moment? It was white on time!

Q. Is it hard for wind gusts to talk to each other?
A. No, it's a breeze!

Wookie says: You might be from Colorado if you shave your leg and wear a skirt because the weather forecast is 60!Local news reported a crocodile was found in Denver! But nobody was surprised because the forecast predicted a cold snap!You might be from Colorado if it snows two feet and you don't expect school to be canceled!

Q. If a band is playing at Redrocks during a thunderstorm, who is most likely to get hit by lightning?
A.
The Conductor!

Q. What does a Rocky Mountain wear when it gets cold?
A.
An ice cap.

It was so cold in Colorado yesterday that my shadow froze to the sidewalk.

Q. Why did the blonde skier only wear one boot?
A. Channel 7's Mike Nelson said there was a 50% chance of snow.

Q. How do you keep your feet warm during a Colorado snow storm?
A.
Don't go out brrr-footed!

You might be from Colorado if you expect snow on Easter, Mother's Day, Halloween, and Thanksgiving – but not on Christmas.

You might be from Colorado if you grew up planning your Halloween costume around your parka!When a weatherman updates viewers on rapidly moving gray clouds, is that a stratus report?Ape chef says: You might be from Colorado if you fire up the grill after shoveling a foot of snow off the deck!

Q. What happened to the Colorado cow that was lifted into a tornado?
A.
Udder disaster.

Q. How is a Colorado blizzard warning like Christmas?
A. Last minute shopping in crowded stores!

Q. How do you make antifreeze?
A. Take away her blanket!

Q. What do Colorado lightning bolts do when they laugh?
A.
They crack up.

Q. How do competitor Denver weather forecasters greet each other?
A. With a cold wave!

Q. What is the opposite of a cold front?
A.
A warm back.

Q. What did the lightning bolt say to the Colorado Blue Spruce?
A.
Hang onto your bark, this will be no ordinary spark!

Q. How are freezing rain on I70 asphalt and cake icing alike?
A. Both are a glaze!

Colorado Winter Pick-Up Line: Babe, is this sidewalk icy? 'Cause I just fell for you.

| Colorado Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | Denver | 2 | 3 |
| You Might Be From Colorado If... | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Tourism | Mountains | 2 | 3 |
| Weather | 2 | 3 | Nightlife | Craft Beer | Munchies | Dogs | Wildlife | 2 | 3 | Sasquatch | 2 |
| Colorado Sports | Go Broncos! | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Colorado Cannabis | Mile High Humor |

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