What does a librarian need for a quick book review?
A. A second glance.
Why was the junior librarian reincarnated as a bookmark?
A. 'Cause he always knew his place.
Why did so few folks at the library check out the Dachshund's
A. Because it was such a long story.
What did the frustrated librarian say when the patrons were
far too noisy?
A. SHH-ut UP!
What did the lunch buffet at the district librarian's conference
A. A table of contents.
What do librarians wear to work at the library?
A. A SHH-irt.
Who is the most famous library cop of all time?
A. Mr. Bookman from the sitcom, Seinfeld.
Why did the blonde open the library book about trees?
A. So she could leaf through it.
a Librarian Line: Hey girl, are you my favorite book? 'Cause
when I look at you, I touch my shelf.
What does it mean when a library feels empty inside?
A. Shelf awareness.
What does a librarian do if his dog starts eating a book
he checked out?
A. He takes the words right out of his mouth!
Where did the lawyer set a precident defending his author
A. In the Book Case.
Why did the library book go to the doctor?
A. Because it needed to be checked out.
What is the name of the most competent librarian?
What is every librarian's favorite wooly animal?
librarians never die, but they just lose their frame of
librarians never die. They just get re-shelved.
Why was the librarian given the Lifetime Achievement Award?
A. 'Cause she had a storied career.
What do you call a librarian in South America who's always
in a hurry to check you out?
A. Urgent Tina.
Point to Ponder at the Library: The dinosaurs did not read.
Now they're extinct.
Which kind of shredded cheese do librarians prefer?
A. SHH-arp cheddar.
Which position does the librarian play on the school faculty
A. SHH-ort stop.
Which brand of permanent marker do librarians use on the
What did the library cop say about his position at the main
A. It's fine.
What does a librarian call somebody who hoards reference