Q. What do you call cattle that tell jokes? A. Laughing stock!   PainfulPuns.com - Animal Puns, Farm Humor, Clucking Funny Jokes!

PainfulPuns Home
Animal Puns, Wildlife Humor
Bartender Puns, Bar Humor
Crappy Puns & Sh*tty Jokes!
Cheesy Puns & Sharp Humor
Clucking Funny Farm Animal Puns
Edible Puns, Fun with Food
Frightful Puns, Scary Jokes
Garden Puns, Green Groaners
Gnome Puns Intended
Painful Jokes & Groaner Puns
Monstrously Funny Puns
Work Humor, Joking on the Job
Old Jokes & Old Never Die Puns
Painful Puns, Punny Funs
Pet Puns + Jokes = Funny Pet Peeves
Sharp Pick-Up Lines, Cheesy Come-Ons
Funny Riddles, Punny Answers!
Sick Puns, Healthy Laughs
Smart Humor! Science + Math = Puns
Tech Jokes, PC Puns & Net Ouch!

And while you're here,
please take a moment to
visit our sponsors:

Q. What do you get if you give pasta to a cow? A. Beefaroni!
You might from Colorado if you will not touch Rocky Mountain Oysters, not even with a ten foot pole!
Cow Chef Says: Spoiler Alert! The milk has been in the fridge for three weeks!
Q. What do you call a cow that's afraid of the dark? A. A coward!
Q. Why does a milking stool only have three legs? A. Because the cow has the udder!
Q. Why did the cow jump over the moon? A. Because the farmer had cold hands!
Cow Chef Asks: Why did yogurt go to the art exhibit? A. Because it was cultured!

 


Cow Jokes, Bovine Humor, Pucky Cow Puns
Moo-sey on in for cow comedy, dairy funny cow jokes, bovine humor and bull sh*t cow puns.

Funny Cow Jokes, Bull Humor, Cow Riddles
(Because Urban Cow Jokes and City Puns Are TOO Mainstream for Crazed Cows and Horny Bulls on Wall Street!)
Warning: Manure Animals and Cows Present. Watch Where You Walk! The smell isn't the most painful pat here.
| Funny Cow Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Beefy Humor | 2 | Funky Chicken Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
| Cowboy Jokes | Farmer Jokes | Baad Sheep Puns for Ewe | Pig Puns | 2 | 3 | Goose, Duck Puns |
| Horse Humor | 2 | 3 | Donkey Puns | Broncos Jokes | Animal Poop Puns | Wild Animal Jokes |
| Animal Music Jokes | Party Animal Puns | Pet Puns | Sports Animal Jokes | Xmas Animals |
| Farm Puns and Farm Animal Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Animal Pick-Up Lines
|

Q. Where did the bull lose all his money? A. At teh cowsino!Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before. Q. What do you get if you cross a chicken and a cow? A. Roost Beef!

Q. Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
A. Because they lactose!

Q. What do you call it if a mad cow gets loose?
A. Udder destruction!

Q. What is a high tech Aussie cow called?
A. An E-moo.

Q. What do you get from a cowmedian?
A. Cream of Wit and lots of bullcrap.

Q. What do you get from a forgetful cow?
A. Milk of Amnesia!

Q. Why do cows like Painful cow Puns?
A. They like being a-moosed.

Q. How does a cow become virtually invisible?
A. She uses camooflage.

Q. What do you get if you sit under a cow?
A. A pat on the head!

Steak Pick-Up Line: You're my grill and I'm your broil.

Q. What did the cow say to the lady butcher?
A. You're making a big steak, Miss.

Q. Where do cows buy their stuff?
A. From a cattle-log.

Q. Why did the cow tell the cowpoke to leave her calf alone?
A. She believed children should be seen and not herded!

Q. What do you call a cow who gives no milk? A. A Milk DudQ. Why was the cow afraid? A. She was a cow-herd!Q. What do you call a cow who gives no milk? A. An Udder Failure

Q. Where can you find a gallery of cows?
A. At an art moo-seum.

Q. What do young calves call their lifelong buddies?
A. Best Friends for Heifer!

Q. What does the Invisible Man drink with his meals?
A. Evaporated milk.

Q. What classic rock band is a favorite of cows?
A. Moo-dy Blues.

Q. Why do cows lie down when it rains?
A. To keep each udder dry.

Q. How do you know that there are cows in heaven?
A. It's a place of udder delight.

Q. What do you get if you cross a cow and a weed eater?
A. A Lawnmooer!

Q. What did the sleep-deprived rancher say to his cow who was mooing into the wee hours?
A. It's pasture bedtime!

Q. What is the worst thing you can call a cow?
A. A MOOron.

Q. What do you get if you cross a cow and a duck?
A. Milk and Quackers.

Q. What do you call one cow half?
A. Calf.

Q. What was the cattle rustler doing when he broke into the ranch?
A. Taking stock.

Q. Why can't cows become detectives? A. Because they refuse to go on steak-outs!Q. What do you call a sleeping bull? A. Bull DozerQ. Is t easy to ilk a cow? A. It's a piece of steak!

Q. What did the beef steak gossip to the pork chop?
A. Did you meet Frank's new girlfriend, Patty? I hear they're engaged to be marinated.

Q. Why did the cow kick Roy Rogers?
A. She heard he was a cowpuncher.

Q. Why does a cow go to work each day?
A. To earn lots of moola.

Q. How do bulls drive cars?
A. They just steer them.

Q. What do you call a grumpy cow?
A. Moo-dy.

Q. How can you tell which cow is the best dancer?
A. You have to wait until she busts a moove.

Q. Why was the psychic cow so hard to find?
A. She was medium rare.

Q. What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
A. Anybody can roast beef.

Q. How far can steak go in school?
A. It can go to cowledge where it can get up to 450 degrees.

Q. What do you get if you cross a cow and a poodle?
A. Cow Poo!

Q. What do you get from a pampered cow? A. Spoiled MilkQ. What do you call a cow without any front legs? A. Lean beef!Q. Why can't cows remember what they're told? A. It just goes in one ear and out the udder!

Q. Where do cows go for lunch?
A. Calf-eteria.

Q. What do you call a very sad cow?
A. Mooved to tears.

Q. What does a calf get after its done all its chores?
A. A little moo-ney.

Bull Pick-Up Poetry: Roses are red, violets are blue, with you in my head, this cow goes moooo.

Q. What do you call a cow with only two left feet?
A. A side of beef.

No, BBQ beef is not just a mere udderance to a grill master.

Q. What is a cow's favorite holiday?
A. Moo-morial Day

Cow Pick-Up Line: Hay Bessie, my love for you is as crazy as mad cow disease.

Q. What goes boo boo boo?
A. A cow with a stuffy nose.

Q. What goes ooooo?
A. A cow with no lips.

Q. What goes oom oom?
A. A cow walking backward.

Cow Pick-Up Line: Hay Elsie, can I place this cowbell around your neck? 'Cause I want to follow you forever.

Q. Why was teh rancher arrested at the gym? A. He was hurting his calves!You might be from Colorado if you highly recomment the Rocky Mountain Oysters to your visiting in-laws!Q. What do you say to a bodybuilding cow farmer? A. Show us your calves!

Q. Why did the cow stop running?
A. Because her calves were sore.

Q. Why are cows such gifted dancers?
A. They're born hoofers.

Q. Do they serve T-bone steaks in Transylvania?
A. Only very rarely.

Q. Why did the skeleton go to the barbeque?
A. To get a spare rib.

Q. Why did the beef herd return to the cannabis field?
A. It was a classic case of the pot calling the cattle back. Plus, the steaks have never been higher!

Q. Why do cows like to ski at Aspen?
A. Because of all the moo-guls.

Q. Where do USA cows go to vacation?
A. Moontana and Cowlifornia.

Q. What do weightlifting cows have for dessert?
A. Beefcake!

Q. What do you get if you put a cow on a trampoline?
A. A milk shake.

Q. How do you describe a very fit bull that goes to the gym?
A. Beefy.

Bull asks: Did you hear about the guy who died eating Rocky Mountain Oysters? The bull dragged him more than a mile!Q. Why don't cows have any money? A. Because farmers milk them dry!Q. What is a cow's favorite deli meat? A. Bull-ogna!

Q. What did the grill master say to the vegan?
A. Sorry, I can't listen to your rantings right now, while more important things are at steak.

Q. Which animals like to wear socks?
A. Calves.

Bullish Pick-Up Line: Hey Bessie, I have a major horn on for you.

Q. What is the definition of derange?
A. Where de cowboys ride wild.

Q. What do you call a really strong cow?
A. Beefy.

Q. What do cows suffer from when they're sick?
A. Hay Fever.

Bull Pick-Up Line: Cow you doin'?

Q. What do you call it when a steer is on stilts?
A. Raising the steaks!

Q. What is a cow's least favorite Elvis Presley song?
A. Love Meat Tenders.

Q. Which sport entails rounding up and stealing cattle as a form of dramatic entertainment?
A. Professional rustling.

| Funny Cow Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Beefy Humor | 2 | Funky Chicken Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
| Cowboy Jokes | Farmer Jokes | Baad Sheep Puns for Ewe | Pig Puns | 2 | 3 | Goose, Duck Puns |
| Horse Humor | 2 | 3 | Donkey Puns | Broncos Jokes | Animal Poop Puns | Wild Animal Jokes |
| Animal Music Jokes | Party Animal Puns | Pet Puns | Sports Animal Jokes | Xmas Animals |
| Farm Puns and Farm Animal Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Animal Pick-Up Lines |


PainfulPuns Home
You've moo-ved along this far, so here's even more cudding edge humor,
udderly funny jokes, and hoof-ful painful puns that you dairy not miss
:

More Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...

| Bartender Jokes | Cents-Less Puns | Chef Humor | Cowlorado Jokes | Cross the Road | ESP Puns | Fit Jokes |
| Hipster Jokes | Mechanic Jokes | Music Jokes | Oh Crap! | Outer Space Puns | Pick-Up Lines | Religion Jokes |
| Sci-Fi Jokes | Seasonal Puns | Sports Jokes | Tech Gadget Puns | Weather Jokes | Travel Puns | Weed Jokes |

Animal Puns, Wildlife Humor Garden Puns, Green Groaners Edible Puns, Fun with Food
Pet Puns + Jokes = Funny Pet Peeves Crappy Puns & Sh*tty Jokes! Cheesy Puns & Sharp Humor

Thanks for stopping by and see you again soon!

Join us on social media and please feel free to share our memes with friends and family:
PainfulPuns at Facebook PainfulPuns at Twitter PainfulPuns at Pinterest

©2017-2020 Painfulpuns.com PainfulPuns.com Logo Man All rights reserved.