Why was the farmer so teffified by his pumpkins?
A. Because after he watered the seeds, they grew some
and then grew some more!
Point to Ponder: If I bought an ant farm, where would I
find a tractor that small?
Why is it hard to keep secrets on a farm?
A. Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
Up a Farmer Line: Hey big guy, is that a phone in your
pocket, or is your rooster happy to see me?
Wisdom: Never throw in the trowel!
Where do cows ride in the train?
A. The cow-boose.
What do you get if you cross a rabbit and a cow?
A. Hare in your milk.
Why does a cow go to work each day?
A. To earn lots of moola.
Where do USA cows like to retire?
A. St. Moois, Moosouri, or Moo Jersey.
Pick-Up Line: Hay Elsie,
can I place this cowbell around your neck? 'Cause I want
to follow you forever.
When is a farmer a magician?
A. When he turns the cows into the pasture.
Why did the blonde farmer plant each potato in a paper lunch
A. She wanted to keep the dirt out of their eyes!
What did the aging farmer say to his wife on their wedding
A. Like a prune, you aren't getting better looking, but
you are getting sweeter!
Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, was your
daddy a pumpkin? 'Cause you are lookin' so gourdgeous.