Chimp says: Ten years without brushing causes horrible tooth decade!   PainfulPuns.com - Sick Puns, Doctor Jokes, Healthy Humor

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Q. Why did the dentist say to the computer? A. This won't hurt a byte!
Q. Why did Bruce's dentist give him mouthwash? A. He had bat breath!

Q. Why did the cheerleader go to the dentist? A. She needed a ROOT canal!
Regular visitors to the dentist ARE familiar with the drill!

 


Dentist Humor, Toothy Grins, Healthy Smiles
Say AAH for Dentist puns, mouthy humor, and dental jokes you can really dig your teeth into.

Funny Dentist Jokes, Tooth Humor, Dental Puns
(Because Novocaine Is TOO Mainstream and Healthy Laughter, Toothy Grins, and Mouthy Puns Are a Real Gas!)
Warning: Proceed with Caution! Recommended by 4 out of 5 painless dentists. You know the painful pun drill!
| Dentist Jokes and Toothy Grins | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Doctor Jokes, Nurse Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |
| Surgeon Jokes | Urologist Jokes | Constipation Jokes | Diarrhea Jokes | Blood Jokes | 2 |
| Dopey Pharmaceutical Jokes | Futuristic Medical Jokes | Sci-Fi Doctor Jokes | Dr. Who Jokes |
| Eye Doctor Jokes and Optometrist Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Eye Puns | Sick Pick-Up Lines |
| Optometry Jokes | Ophthalmology Jokes | Optician Puns | Glasses Jokes, Eyewear Spectacles |
| Shrink Humor, Psychiatrist Jokes, Insanely Crazy Puns | Brainy Puns and Cerebral Jokes | 2 |

Q. What do you call advice from your dentist? A. Dental floss-ophy!Q. What did the tooth say to the departing dentist? A Fill me in when you return!Q. What does the dentist of the year get? A. A little plaque!

Painful Dental Pun of the Day: A dentist with a toothache could have a bad impact on his patients.

Q. What game are you playing if you don't take care of your teeth?
A. Tooth or Dare!

Today's Toothy Dental Joke: Always be kind to your dentist because he's got fillings, too!

Q. What do you call a dentist who just can't stop working on teeth?
A. Abscessive Compulsive.

Patient: Doc, do you always extract teeth painlessly?
Dentist: Frankly, No. Last month I dislocated my wrist.

Q. What does your dentist call x-rays?
A. Tooth-Pics!

Dental Point to Ponder: Why do dentist jokes make you feel down in the mouth?

Q. What happened when the guy went to his dentist for root canal?
A. He lost his nerve!

Q. How many dentists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. 4 out of 5 dentists recommend you just do it yourself.

Q. What happened after the guy had a first date with a dental hygienist?
A. She said she'd had a great time and she'd like to see me again in six months...

My dentist simply wouldn't stop working on my teeth? I guess he was abscess-ive compulsive?

Q. What is your dentist's favorite day of the week?
A. Tooths-day!

Dental Point to Ponder: If you get false teeth but can't pay for them, and have to make alternative payments, does that make you an indentured servant?

Did you know Al Gore wrote a book about dentistry? Yeah, it's titled An Inconvenient Tooth.

Q. What did Yoda's dentist say?
A. May the Floss Be With You!

Q. What does a dentist call an astronaut's cavity? A. A black hole!Q. Why did a blonde go to the dentist? A. Because somebody dented her car!Chimp says: Ten years without brushing causes horrible tooth decade!

Q. How do you get to Tooth Island?
A. Aboard the Tooth Ferry!

Q. How are the bogeyman and false teeth alike?
A. Both only come out at night!

Today's Tooth Care Fact: A good dentist is a little picky, but a great dentist never gets on your nerves!

Q. How did Socrates' dentist make his mark on history?
A. With Flossophy.

Q. Why did the old tree need to see a dentist?
A. For a root canal.

Q. Why do so many people dislike going to the dentist?
A. Because he's boring!

Q. Why did the blonde bring spelunking gear to her dentist's office?
A. She heard there was a big cavity and wanted to explore it.

Patient: I don't know which is worse, having a tooth pulled or having a baby.
Dentist: Well, make up your mind because I'll have to adjust the chair.

Q. Why did the blonde send her dentist a note?
A. Toothank him!

Q. Why do you forget about a tooth right after the dentist pulls it?
A. Duh! Because it goes right out of your head!

Q. What happened to the blonde who put her dentures in backwards?
A. She accidentally ate herself!

Q. What does your dentist call the fear of flossing your teeth?
A. Flosstrophobia!

Dental Groan of the Day: Contemplating my imminent root canal procedure was deeply unnerving.

Q. What is a toothache?
A. A pain that drives people to extraction.

Q. What happens when there's a national dentist strike?
A. You have to brace yourself!

Q. Why did the dentist faint?
A. Her son came home an announced he'd joined the hockey team!

Q. Which procedure do orthodontists perform when molars are too close together?
A. Teeth widening.

Q. Who has the most dangerous job in Transylvania? A. Dracula's dentist!Q. What did the dentist see at the North Pole? A. A molar bear!Q. What is the best way to get a job at a dentist office? A. Word of mouth!

Q. How are vampires and false teeth alike?
A. They only come out at night!

Q. How long did it take for two Transylvania dentist to fall for each other?
A. It was love at first bite.

Q. How does an elderly vampire refer to his new false teeth?
A. As a new fangled invention.

Q. How far is it to the fang's dentist office?
A. Tooth smiles.

Q. How long did it take for the two fangs to fall in love?
A. It was lust at first bite.

Q. Why did a snowman visit an orthodontal dentist?
A. To correct his frostbite!

Q. What does a dentist call a grizzly who lost all his teeth?
A. A Gummy Bear!

Q. Which cause do Molar Bears crusade for?
A. They fight against enamel cruelty!

Q. What did one tooth say to another tooth?
A. Thar's gold in them thar fills!

Q. Where does a mobile dental clinic go after hours?
A. To a molar home park.

Q. Where do killer whales go to get braces?
A. To an orca-dontist.

Q. What did one tooth say to another in an attempt to make it jealous?
A. The dentist is taking me out tonight!

Dentist: Don't worry. I'm painless.
Patient: Um, I'm not!

Dental Factoid of the Day: Dentists don't like having a bad day at the orifice!

Q. What's the difference between a vampire with a toothache and a rainstorm?
A. One roars in pain, and the other pours the rain.

Biting Dental Joke of the Day: Nobody knew she had a dental implant, until it came out in conversation.

Dental Point to Ponder: My dentist seemed a bit distracted today. Is he just brushing me off?

Dentistry Fact of the Day: Dentists deal with the same old grind, day after day.

Q. What will your dentist give you for $1? A. Buck teeth!Q. What did the dentist do on the roller coaster? A. He braced himself!Q. Why does the dentist seem moody? A. He always looks down in the mouth!

Q. Why did the dentist go to the tooth store?
A. To bicuspids!

Q. What do you call the practical advice your dentist gives you?
A. His fill-osophy.

Dentist: This will hurt a bit.
Patient: Okay.
Dentist: I've been having an affair with your wife.

Q. What did the dentist's girlfriend say when she broke up with him?
A. No hard fillings...

Q. Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
A. Because it lost its filling.

Dental Groan of the Day: I was feeling a little crooked, but my dentist straightened me out.

Q. What's the best way to find a painless dentist in your neighborhood?
A. Word of mouth.

Q. How do you describe an elderly dentist?
A. A bit long in the tooth.

Straight Dentist Grin of the Day: Did you hear about the dentist who put braces on his patient as a stop-gap measure?

Q. What does a dentist-in-training do before an oral exam?
A. He brushes up!

Q. Why did the tatoo artist's molar just want to be left alone?
A. It needed time tooth-ink.

Q. Which brilliant dentist wrote the book, Toothpaste Loves Teeth?
A. Flo Ryde.

Q. Why are dentists such expert problem solvers?
A. They always get to the root of the problem.

A guy goes to to the dentist and the doctor asked, "When's the last time you flossed. The guy replied, "You remember. You were there."

Dentist Pick Up Line: Hey baby, you look so sweet that you're giving me a cavity.

Please stop telling punny dentist jokes!
– Oral B. Madd.

Q. What is a drill team?
A. A group of dentists who all work together!

A patient asked his orthodontist if he gave up candy, popcorn and gum, will his braces come off sooner. The dentist said, "No, it will only seem longer."

Q. Why did the pet store owner call his dentist?
A. His canines were loose.

Q. What is your dentist's least favorite game?
A. Tooth or Consequences!

Q. Who is the most famous Scottish dentist of all time?
A. Phil N. McCavity.

Q. What time is it hardest to schedule a dental appointment?
A. Tooth-Hurty!

Dentist Fact of the Day: An orthodontist always gets to the root of the problem.

Old dentists never die, but they do lose their pull.

| Dentist Jokes and Toothy Grins | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Doctor Jokes, Nurse Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |
| Surgeon Jokes | Urologist Jokes | Constipation Jokes | Diarrhea Jokes | Blood Jokes | 2 |
| Dopey Pharmaceutical Jokes | Futuristic Medical Jokes | Sci-Fi Doctor Jokes | Dr. Who Jokes |
| Eye Doctor Jokes and Optometrist Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Eye Puns | Sick Pick-Up Lines |
| Optometry Jokes | Ophthalmology Jokes | Optician Puns | Glasses Jokes, Eyewear Spectacles |
| Shrink Humor, Psychiatrist Jokes, Insanely Crazy Puns | Brainy Puns and Cerebral Jokes | 2 |
| Sick Medical Jokes, Hospital Puns, and Healthy Humor | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |

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