Gym Joke: Gnome body builders are not ab-gnormal! - Painful Puns, Punny Funs, Groaners, Ouch!

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Never lie to an X-ray technician. They can see right through you.
Captain Kirk Says: Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes!
Gnome nude bathing. You've been warned!
Q. Which exercise do pirates do for great abs? A. Planks!


Good Body Jokes, Nudist Humor, Bod Puns
Get debriefed with hot body humor, naked laughs, fitful physique jokes and ab-normal puns.

Physique Jokes, Body Puns, Figure Humor
('Cause Barely Nude Jokes ane Naked Puns Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream At a Doctor's Office or Auto Body Shop!)
Warning: Proceed Cautiously Kicking bod jokes, hardbody humor, and human physique puns to figure out ahead.
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When I came out of te gym, a cop asked me where I got that body. I said, "I don't know, I just opened the trunk and whe was there!"Gym Pick-Up Line: If I said you had a great body, would you hold it against me?Q. Why did the skeleton cross the road? A. To get to the body shop!

Q. What is the creepiest thing about joggers?
A. They're always the ones who discover the dead body.

A guy tossed a penny down the well and made a wish … that the police would never find Penny's body.

Gym Confession: Sometimes, I look like I'm working out, but I'm actually using every muscle in by body to keep from farting.

Hot Body Fact of the Day: Did you realize that Dr. Frankenstein was actually the first bodybuilder?

Hot Body Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, going to a sculpture class won't even get you this chiseled.

Funny Fitness Factoid: Most of the men and women at the gym are working toward one goal: The Perfect Female Body!

Doctor: Did you know there are 206 bones in the human body?
Blonde Nurse: Shhhh. There's a pack of hungry dogs outside!

Fitness Philosophy Failure: I've accepted the fact that being cremated is the only way I'll ever have a smokin' hot body.

Police Department Groan of the Day: If I knew I was getting a full-body search, I would have waxed.

Food Pick-Up Line: Is your body from McDonald's? 'Cause I'm Lovin' It!Q. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? A. He had no body to go with!Q. What do you call a cabbage with a good body? A. Head and shoulders above the rest!

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey there, did you get that body at McDonald's? 'Cause of that Big Mac, my macros are all over the place.

Sick Pick-Up Line: Hey hot girl, are you a virus? 'Cause you're having an effect on my whole body.

Did you hear about the bodybuilder who took part in the sun tanning event at the Olympics? He only got the bronze.

A head walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "What do you have that's full-bodied?"

Q. What does a mommy cannibal say to the kids at dinner time?
A. Don't talk with somebody in your mouth.

Gym Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, do you know karate? 'Cause your body is really kicking!

Bodybuilder Point to Ponder: Why don't some people exercise their mind as much as they exercise their body?

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side of the body was cut off? He's all right now!

Police Pick-Up Line: I'm from the FBI, Fine Body Investigations, and I'm going to have to ask you to assume the position.

Q. What did the sailors say when the hula dancer performed? A. Hip Hip Hooray!Gnome nudist colony ahead. You've been warned!Babe, I gnome my math and you have one significant figure!

My body is not a temple ... It is a microbrewery with legs.

Q. Why did the blonde skier cut a hole near the top of her boyfriend's ski parka?
A. She wanted to give him the cold shoulder.

Q. Where do body-concious space aliens go for a good workout on Earth?
A. Planet Fitness.

A truck carrying red wine vinegar collided with an olive oil truck at the nudist camp. First responders reported everyone there was well dressed.

Q. What do you call a naked fish?
A. A barracuda.

Q. What do the cops call a person who has been debriefed?
A. Nudist.

Q. How did the bodybuilder know he was finally the hottest guy at the gym?
A. He had a fever of 102.

Q. Why did a girl ghost go on a diet?
A. She wanted to keep her ghoulish figure.

A skunk ambles into Wynkoop Brewing Company in LoDo Denver and asks the beer-tender, "Hey, where did everybody go?"

Q. Why did the bodybuilder buy tape from the hardware store? A. Somebody told him he was ripped!Hulk Asks: What do you get if you cross a body builder and a peeping Tom? A. Amazing Peeks!Gnome Nude Beach. You've been warned!

Q. What do you call a beer drinker without a six-pack?
A. Beer belly.

Police Pick-Up Line: No Officer, I'm not drunk. I'm just intoxicated by the amazing six-pack under your vest.

Six-pack abs are cool and all, but have you tried craft beer?

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, are you thirsty? 'Cause I've got a six-pack right here.

Q. Which rapper has small abdominal muscles?
A. 2Pac.

Q. What is it called when your body is sore and achy at work all the time?
A. Aching out a living.

Q. When the rooster went on a workout regimen, what was his result?
A. Good pecks.

Q. What do chickens work on at the gym?
A. Their pecks!

Bodybuilder Tip of the Day: Before every workout, always warm up with at least 10 reps of hot body selfies to both Facebook and Twitter.

Q. What is an eco-friendly body?
A. It has a little waist.

Q. What do you call a fitness center that's dirty and smells like body odor and sweaty socks?
A. Gym-nasty-um.

Nurse Pick Up Line: Hey big guy, I can feel every pulse in your body.

Bodybuilder Joke of the Day: Gymnasium means naked exercise in ancient Greek. But don't try that line on the health club receptionist, unless you've seen an ode to her on an urn!

Q. What do you call a snake that's not wearing clothes?
A. Snaked!

Q. Which Aussies were the first to concentrate on working out their ab muscles?
A. The native Ab-Originals.

Q. What do you call it when o
medical instrument is used on a swollen red mark on your body?
A. Welt management.

Q. Where are most fish found?
A. Between the head and the tail.

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