Hey Gnirl, do you need a Band-aid? 'Cause falling from heaven must hurt!   PainfulPuns.com - Cheesy Pick Up Line, Sharp Come-Ons, Punny!

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Gnirl, do you have an inhaler? 'Cause you take my breath away!
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing, but mean your mother.
Q. Why did the dentist ask his secretary out? A. He was already taking out her tooth!
You are obviously suffering a lack of Vitamin Me!
A dentist married a manicurist, but they fought like tooth and nail!


Sick Pick-Up Lines, Hospital Hit Ups, Doc Come-Ons
Hit up a nurse with lame chat ups, ER hookups, and sick MD come-on jokes. Stat!

Medical Pick Up Lines, Doctor Chat Ups, EMT Flirts
(Because Emergency Cosmetic Surgery Come-Ons Could Only Be TOO Mainstream If Your Love Life is In a Coma!)
Warning: Hit Up a Pharmacist with Caution! High dose pick-up lines, EMT hookups, and medicated laughs ahead.
| Sick Come Ons | Sick Medical Humor | Doctor Jokes | Eye Doctor Jokes | Optometry Jokes |
| Ophthalmology Jokes | Eye Puns | Optician Humor | Glasses Jokes, Eyewear Spectacles |
| Psychiatrist Jokes | Surgeon Jokes | Urologist Jokes | Constipation Jokes | Diarrhea Jokes |
| Dentist Puns | Dopey Pharmaceutical Jokes | Futuristic Medical Jokes | Sci-Fi Doctor Jokes |

Q. Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? A. Breasts don't have eyes!Sick Pick-Up Line: Hey Gnirl, I hope you know CPR 'cause you're taking my breath away!McCoy Says: Doctor's orders, Jim. Be a vulcan in the streets and a Klingon in the sheets!

EMT Pick Up Line: Babe, those clothes look uncomfortable. Let me cut them off you.

First Aid Pick Up Line: Are you drowning? Because I'm feeling the urge to give you CPR.

ER Medic Chat Up Line: Hi there, did you know I am really great at rapid clothing removal?

Sick Pick Up Line: Hey girl, you've got 206 bones in your body. Want to be exceptional and add one more?

Come-On Point to Ponder: Can Pick Up Lines actually make you sick?

EMT Hookup Line: Hey babe, we always come when we are called.

Medical Pick Up Line: ICU in my dreams!

Pick Up an EMT Line: If I go into cardiac arrest, will you give me mouth-to-mouth?

Pick Up a Paramedic Line: Hey big guy, is that an epi-pen in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

Medical Pick Up Line: Hey babe, are you an anesthesiologist? 'Cause I felt no pain when you walked by.

COVID19 Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, you can't spell VIRUS without U and I.

Dr. McCoy Pick Up Line: Nancy, they don't call me Bones because I'm a doctor.

EMT Chat Up Line: Sit back and relax 'cause I fix broken hearts.

Medical Pick Up Line: Let's exchange genetic infomation!

Doctor Pick Up Line: Can I take your temperature? Because you're looking hot today!

Sick, Sick Hookup Line: Hey girl, playing Doctor is for kids. Let's go back to my place and play Gynecologist.

Hey Gnirl, does your left eye hurt? 'Cause you're lookin' alright!I was dating a girl with a lazy eye, but I had to break up with her because she was seeing someone on the side!Sick Pick-Up Line: You got an inhaler? 'Cause I heard you got dat ass ma!

Q. Why did the near-sighted woman marry her optometrist?
A. It was an eye-deal relationship!

Cardiac Surgeon Pick Up Line: Hey babe, just sit back and relax. I know how to fix a broken heart.

Medical Pick Up Line: Do you have Life Alert? 'Cause I've fallen for you and I can't get up!

EMT Chat Up Line: Hey girl, not to boast, but paramedics know five different ways to pick you up.

Medical Come-On: Am I attracted to you, or is it just volatile blood sugars?

Sick Pick Up Line: Babe, are you a virus? 'Cause you're having an effect on my whole body.

Looking for something to tickle her funny bone? Just make a couple of hum-iris witticisms!

Doctor Pick Up Line: You must be my coronary artery because you're wrapped around my heart.

EMT Pick Up Line: Hey there, I really do know how to shock the socks off you.

Ambulance Driver Come-On: Hey bae, I am an expert in mouth to mouth.

EMT Pick Up Line: Hey, I'm familiar with both latex and restraints.

Sick Chat Up Line: Hey girl, I'm not an organ donor, but I'd gladly give you my heart.

Corona Virus Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, if COVID19 doesn't take you out, can I?

Medical Pick Up Line: Are you COPD? Because you take my breath away.

Pick Up a Doctor Line: Hey dude, are you an allergist? 'Cause you take my breath away.

Sick Come-On: Hey hottie, you breathe oxygen and so do I! Looks like we already have something in common.

Doctor Pick Up Line: You get my heart racing like an epinehrine drip!

Sick Pick Up Line: Hey baby, do you need a love doctor? 'Cause I have a medicated degree.

ER Hookup Line: You are obviously suffering a lack of vitamin ME!

COVID19 Pick-Up Line: Hello there. You can't spell quarantine without U R A Q T.

Q. What did the guy with the broken leg say to his nurse on Valentine's Day? A. I've got a crutch on you!Did you hear about the circumcision doctor's wife who kept the foreskins? She made them into a purse. When she rubbed it, it became an overnight bag!Q. What did the parietal say to the frontal? A. I lobe you!

Nurse Pick Up Line: Hey big guy, I can feel every pulse in your body.

Pick Up a Nurse Line: Just listen to your heart, and be my date tonight.

Medical Student Come-On: Wanna go study my anatomy?

VD Day Pick Up Line in the Bone Lab: Hey Bae, I want tibia your Valentine!

Medical Hookup Line: Someday I hope to be your emergency contact.

Sick Pick Up Line: Hey babe, are you a genetic love mutation? 'Cause now my DNA no longer has A, T, G, C – it only has U, U, U, and U.

Sick Pick Up Line: Girl, are you an appendix? 'Cause I have a gut feeling I should take you out.

Did you hear about the nurse who swallowed a razor blade? She gave herself a tonsillectomy, an appendectomy, a hysterectomy – and circumcised three of the doctors on her shift.

Patient Pick Up Line: Hey babe, I have my own mult-positional bed at home.

Medical Chat Up Line: Hey there, are you a cardiologist? 'Cause I want to surrender my heart to you.

Medical Student Hookup Line: Hi, let's go back to my pad to study some anatomy in depth.

Brain Surgeon Hookup Line: Hey girl, if I synapse with you, we'll store some memories.

Q. What is a good pick-up line an axon terminal can use on a dendrite?
A. Let's Connect!

Sleep Clinic Pick Up Line: Babe, you seem to induce REM sleep in me, 'cause you're the only thing I dream about.

Sick Come-On: Hey babe, either I have vertigo, or you just rocked my world?

Medicated Pick Up Line: Hey girl, are you Morphine? 'Cause you take my pain away.

My psychiatrist sent me for an MRI because she thinks I have a magnetic personality.

Q. Why should you love your eye doctor? A. It's an eye-deal relationship!Crappy Gnome Humor: My love for you is like diarrhea, I can't hold it in!Q. Why did the optometrist couple get divorced? A. They just couldn't see eye to eye!

Q. What did the optometrist say when he proposed to his girlfriend?
A. Eye Love You!

Q. What is an eye doctor's favorite pick-up line?
A. Does your left eye hurt? 'Cause you're lookin' alright!

Blurry Funny Pick Up Line: Hey girl, something must be wrong with my eyes 'cause I just can't take them off you.

Lab Tech Chat Up Line: Hey babe, are you a C-reactive protein? 'Cause you have a-cute phase.

Medical Pick Up Line: Hey bae, my heart beats for you and that is why my ECG has a U wave.

Painful Pick Up Line: Girl, do you need a band-aid? 'Cause falling from heaven must hurt!

Corona Virus Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, if you meed toilet paper, I am your Prince Charmin.

Truly Sick Pick Up Line: Hey girl, my love for you burns hotter than my urinary tract infection.

Colorblind Pick Up Line: Hey babe, no wonder the sky is gray today. All the blue is in your eyes.

Dentist Pick Up Line: You look so sweet that you're giving me a cavity.

Shrink Chat Up Line: Hey babe, you raise my dopamine levels!

Sick Hookup Line: Hey girl, are you a medical professional? 'Cause you just cured my ED.

Toothy Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, you're like my false teeth. I can't smile without you!

Anti Pick-Up an Optician Line: Dude, after a closer look, eye like you even less.

Blurry Pick Up Line: Hey babe, you're so hot that my glasses fogged up.

COVID19 Pick-Up Line: Hey big guy, is that hand sanitizer in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

Did you hear about the dentist and manicurist couple who broke up? They fought tooth and nail.

Medical Chat Up Line: Hey babe, do you have an Ace bandage? 'Cause when you walked by, I got weak in the knees.

Sick Pick Up Line: Hey baby, are you a shrink? 'Cause I went nuts when you walked by.

Eye Doctor Pick Up Line: Hey girl, eye see you in my future.

Pick Up Line Tip of the Day: Always consult sick come-on jokes for some healthy laughs!

| Doctor Jokes | Dentist Puns | Sick Medical Humor | Eye Doctor Jokes | Psychiatrist Jokes |
| Corny Pick-Up Lines | Cheesy Pick Up Lines | 2 | Animal Pick Up Lines | Arty Hipster Hookups |
| Banker Lines | Bar Come Ons | Chef Chat Ups | Colorado Come Ons | Daily Lines | Farm Flirts |
| Gardener Chat Ups | Gnome Pick Ups | Gym Hookups | Locksmith Openers | Music Hook Lines |
| Pirate Hookup Lines | Police Pick Ups | 2 | Robot Pick-Up Lines | Scary Monster Pick Up Lines |
| Science Fiction Pick Ups | Scientist Flirt Ups | Sick Come Ons | Sports Lines | Travel Hookups |
| Superhero Pick-Up Lines | 2 | Batman Chat Ups | The Hulk Hookups | Superman Come-Ons |
| Thespian Lines | Weed Hookups | 2 | 3 | VD Day Come Ons | Winter Picks | Xmas Chat Ups | 2 |
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| Marriage Jokes, Engaging Wedding Humor | Divorce Jokes | Breakup Jokes, Dateless Puns |
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Crappy Puns & Sh*tty Jokes! Smart Humor! Science + Math = Puns Pot Puns, Weed Jokes, Green Grow-ners!

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