Sick Humor: They told me I had type A blood, but it was a type O.   PainfulPuns.com - Frightful Puns, Scary Jokes, Deadly LOL!

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Q. How are vampires artistic? A. They're good at drawing blood!
Q. What is a vampire's favorite fast food? A. A person with really high blood pressure!

 


Bloody Funny Puns, Blood Humor, Deadly Jokes
4 out of 5 vampires think blood jokes, bleeding humor, vein laughter and clot puns really suck!

Blood Jokes, Halloween Humor, Vein Puns
(Because Going Green Is Too Mainstream for Leeches, Barbers, Cardiac Surgeons and Bloody Funny Vampires!)
Warning: Proceed with Caution! Bloody good laughs, sucking funny jokes, and Typo blood puns flow ahead.
| Blood Jokes | 2 | Vampire Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Skeleton | 2 | Brains | 2 | Sasquatch | 2 |
| Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Halloween Treats | Ghost | Monster | 2 | 3 |
| Friday the 13th Humor | Halloween Music Jokes | Mummy Puns | Witch | Zombie Jokes |

Q. Why did the vampire act so batty? A. It was in his blood!Q. What do vampires think about blood transfusion? A. It's merely new fang-led nonsense!Q. Why did the vampire consider hiself a good artist? A. He like to draw blood!

Q. Why is it so tough to compete with a vampire?
A. Because they're always out for blood.

Q. Which song is the fave of New Orleans blood suckers?
A. Bloodletting (The Vampire Song) by Concrete Blonde.

Q. What did the critics say about the vampire's work of art?
A. What a monsterpiece!

Q. What is the blood type of happy people? A. B Positive!Q. Where do vampires keep their money? A. In a blood bank!Two blood cells met and fell in love, but it was all in vein!

Q. What is Autocorrect's blood type?
A. Typo Negative.

Q. Which creepy gothic tune do powerful old people moan about?
A. We Suck Young Blood by Radiohead.

Q. How do vampires get around?
A. On blood vessels.

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? A. A vampire only sucks blood at night!Q. Why did the vampire tke up acting? A. It was in his blood!Q. Which kind of dog does every vampire own? A. A Bloodhound!

Q. What do you get if you cross Dracula with Al Capone?
A. A blood thirsty fangster.

Q. Why did the vampire's lunch give him heartburn?
A. It was a stake sandwich.

Q. What is a vampire's favorite Shakespeare play?
A. A Midsummer Bite's Dream.

Q. Which tune exposes that vampires and monsters are not as frightening as falling in love?
A. Dracula's Wedding by Outkast.

Q. Why don't vampires spend much at restaurants?
A. Because they eat necks to nothing.

Q. What does a vampire with weight issues drink?
A. Blood Lite.

There are over 60,000 miles of blood vessels in the human body. No wonder I have tired blood!Q. What did a vampire do at teh blood bank? A. He asked to make a withdrawal!Q. What's a vampire's favorite drink? A. A Bloody Mary!

Q. Why did the vampire give his girlfriend a blood test?
A. To confirm she was his type.

Whatever you do, always give 100% – unless you're donating blood!

Q. Why did a cop pull the vampire over?
A. He was a suspect in a blood bank robbery.

Q. Why do blonde nurses bring red markers to work?
A. Just in case they need to draw blood.

Q. What did the three vampires order at the bar?
A. Two Bloods and a Blood Light.

Q. Why did the vampire break up with her boyfriend?
A. He wasn't her blood type.

| Blood Jokes | 2 | Vampire Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Skeleton | 2 | Brains | 2 | Sasquatch | 2 |
| Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Halloween Treats | Ghost | Monster | 2 | 3 |
| Friday the 13th Humor | Halloween Music Jokes | Mummy Puns | Witch | Zombie Jokes |
| Frightful Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | Scary Pick-Up Lines |
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