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Q. What is a zombie's favorite day of the week? Fray Day!

Q. What do you call a hat for the brain? A. Thinking cap!

Q. How can you tell if a woman is wearing panty hose? A. If she farts, her ankles swell up!

 


Scary Clothing Jokes and Frightening Frock Humor
Dress to kill with ghoulish garment puns, deadly funny style humor, and spooky boo jean jokes.

Frightful Fashion Jokes and Scary Clothes Puns
(Because Scary Fashion Jokes and Frightful Clothing Puns Could Never Be TOO Mainstream At a Shreik Boo-tique!)
Warning: Proceed Carefully! Scary clothing jokes, ghastly fashion humor, and boo-tyful footwear puns dead ahead.
| Frightful Fashion Jokes | Scary Drink Jokes | Frightful Food Puns | Scary Fun | Spooky Sports |
| Haunted House Puns | Cannibal Jokes | Scary Cemetery Jokes | Vampire Jokes | Scary Dentist |
| Ghost Jokes | Monster Jokes | Mummy Puns | Skeleton Jokes | Scary Witch | Zombie Jokes |
| Scary Halloween Jokes | Halloween Treats | Halloween Music | Pumpkin Puns | Scary Clowns |
| Werewolf Jokes | Scary Animals | Bat Jokes | Bigfoot Jokes | Spider Jokes | Friday the 13th |

Q. What does a barefoot man get if he steps on an electric wire? A. A pair of shocks!
 
Q. What kind of pants do ghosts wear? A. Boo Jeans!
 
Spock Says: Live long and prosper, and don't wear a red shirt!

Q. Where do ghosts shop for designer sheets?
A. At a fashion boo-tique.

Q. What do ghosts wear on their feet during a thunderstorm?
A. Rain boo-ts or ghoul-ashes.

Q. Which style of shoes did the wicked witch wear while disecting a frog?
A. Open-toad.

Q. What is everybody saying about the Incredible Hulk's new fashion line?
A. It's all the rage!

Q. What kind of facial hair does the hipster ghost at the haunted house have?
A. A soul patch.

Q. What does a mother ghost tell her little goblin?
A. Put on your boos and shocks.

Q. What should you wear to a truly scary haunted house?
A. Depends. Not a joke Wear Depends!

Q. Why did the scary leopard wear striped pants?
A. So he wouldn't be spotted.

Q. How did the blue fashion designer die and become a ghost?
A. She committed sew-icide.

Frightful Fashion Point to Ponder: Signs always say, No Sirt, No Shoes, No Service. What about pants?

Q. How did the depressed trousers tailor die on Friday the 13th?
A. Unfortunately, he commited sew-icide.

Q. Which brand of underwear does a mummy wear?
A. Fruit of the Tomb!

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. You're scared to death to wear a red shirt!

Q. How many Red Shirts does it take to change a light bulb?
A. At least two. One to replace the bulb, and at least one to be killed off in the dark.

Q. Why do you have to separate red shirts in the laundry?
A. 'Cause red shirts die so easily!

Q. Why was the space alien wearing a velostat hat?
A. To protect himself from scary idiot Earthling mind control.

Q. Where do serial killers hang their hats and jackets?
A. In the croak-room.

Q. What do you call a hairy beast in a raincoat?
A. An outre wear-wolf.

Hulk Humor: My Zipper Broke, But I Fixed It on the Fly!
 
Q. Why did the monster's mother knit hm three socks for Halloween? A. He grew another foot!
 
Q. What does an exhibitionist snake wear to the beach? A. A Pything!

Q. Why does The Incredible Hulk reject skinny jeans?
A. Because he just can't get into them.

Q. Where do stylish werewolves keep their daytime clothing?
A. In the claws-et.

Q. Why did the skeleton of the blonde get a headache from wearing her dunce cap?
A. 'Cause she was a numb skull.

Q. Which scary brand of underwear was recalled because it explodes?
A. Fruit of the Boom.

Q. What do you call a killer whale that isn't wearing underwear?
A. Free Willy.

Q. Which aftershave do monsters wear?
A. Brute!

Q. Why did the zombie sock designer have his eyes replaced with yarn balls?
A. Because he wanted fiber optics.

Evil old cobblers never die, they just lose their souls.

Q. What's the difference between lawyers and buzzards?
A. Lawyers have removable wingtips.

Q. Which kind of shoes does Jason wear?
A. Crocs!

Sadistic old shoe designers never die, they just lose their souls.

Q. What does a ghost wear if it's pouring outside?
A. Rain BOOts.

Q. Which kind of a snake wears edible underwear?
A. The Pie-Thong!

Q. Which kind of luggage is made from snake skin?
A. Ex-hiss baggage.

Q. Which kind of snake wears a hard hat during the day?
A. A boa constructor.

Q. What do you call a scary crocodile wearing a vest?
A. An in-vest-ti-gator.

Q. Which animated deer wore an explosive vest?
A. Bombi.

Q. Where does a werewolf get a new tail?
A. At a retail store.

Q. Why doesn't Superman have may friends? A. Because he wears his underwear over his pants!
 
Ape says: I bought a pair of hiking boots in Colorado from a drug dealer! I'm not sure what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day!
 
I didn't like my beard at first, but then it grew on me.

Q. Which type of underwear do vampire actors wear?
A. Movie Shorts.

Q. How do you describe an angry monster wearing uncomfortable underwear?
A. Crotchety!

Q. Why don't witches wear underwear?
A. So they get a better grip on their broomstick.

Q. What did Bruce Banner say to his alter ego?
A. Dude, please keep your shirt on!

Q. Why don't busty ghoul ghosts ever wear bras?
A. Because they're tired of all the big boo-bie jokes.

Q. What happened to the wolf that fell into a washing machine?
A. He became a wash-and-wear-wolf.

Q. Why is it so hard to get zombie fashion designers to listen to new ideas?
A. 'Cause they're clothed minded.

Q. What do zombies call some recycled mannequin parts?
A. Hand me downs.

Q. Where can you get a scary good hair cut in Estes Park, Colorado?
A. At Hair's Johnny Salon in the Stanley Hotel.

Frightening Fashion Point to Ponder: If brides wear white because they're pure, why do grooms wear black?

Q. How hard was it for the guy to start the company that manufactures clown shoes?
A. It was no small feet!

Q. What foot attire do ghosts wear during the winter?
A. Snow BOOOts.

Q. Why doesn't The Hulk need to style his hair?
A. Because it lays perfectly still out of sheer terror.

Q. Which barber shop is haunted by ghosts and spirits?
A. The Great Hair After.

Q. What's the scariest thing about growing a beard for No Shave November?
A. Hipsters think you're one of them!

Q. What is everybody saying about the Incredible Hulk's new fashion line?
A. It's all the rage!

Incredible Fashion Factoid: The Hulk doesn't wash his shorts. He disembowels them.

Q. What do you get if you cross a werewolf and a vampire?
A. A fur coat that fangs around your neck!

Q. What does a witch use to keep her hair up? A. Scare spray!
 
If Satan lost his hair, would there be HELL toupee?
 
Q. What do ghosts use to wash their hair? A. Sham-boo!

Q. Why dob't witches wear flat hats?
A. 'Cause they see no point to it.

Q. Why was the blonde wearing a hat shaped like a grave tombstone?
A. 'Cause she had her hair died.

Q. What kind of makeup do witches wear?
A. Ma-scare-a.

Seductive Woman: Undress me with your words.
Wouldbe Beau: There's a scary spider in your bra.

Q. What kind of jewelry do witches wear?
A. Charm bracelets

Q. Where do crazy hat ladies live?
A. Mad-hattan, NY.

Q. What do men really want from their underwear?
A. A bit of support and a lot of freedom.

Q. What happened when the best tailor in town passed away?
A. He was given a fitting eulogy.

Q. What do you call a big angry monster who absolutely will not go outside without his hat?
A. A hot head!

Q. What does a tin foil hat protect the nerdy guy from?
A. Getting a date.

Q. Why did the skeleton wear a party hat on his knee?
A. The bonehead thought it would be funny.

Q. What is it called when one monster knocks the hat off another monster?
A. Decapitation.

Q. Where do old stockings go when they die?
A. If they're hole-y, they go to heaven. But if they stink to high heaven, they go to hell.

Q. What haunting footwear do stylish cowboy ghosts wear?
A. BOOOts.

Q. What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween?
A. White pillow cases.

Q. Which Boston barber shop lost so many customers that it had to close?
A. Jack the Clipper.

Q. What big scary dinosaur wore a a cowboy hat?
A. Tyrannosaurus Tex!

Q. What is a bald zombie wearing a dumb toupee called?
A. A hair brain.

Q. Why should you shave you head before committing an evil act?
A. If you're going to sin, you might as well sin baldly.

Q. Which werewolf had the best makeup and hairstyling in 1981?
A. An American Werewolf in London.

Q. What are a ghost's favorite kind of trousers for just knocking around?
A. Faded Boo Jeans!

Old fashion designers might die, but they do go out in style!

| Frightful Fashion Jokes, Scary Clothing Humor | Scary Sports Jokes | Scary DentistJokes |
| Scary Cocktail Jokes, BOOze Puns, Spooky Drink LOLs | Frightful Food Puns | Scary Party Jokes |
| Haunted Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Halloween Treats | Halloween Music | Pumpkin Puns |
| Ghost Jokes | Monster Jokes | 2 | 3 | Mummy Puns | Skeleton Jokes | 2 | Scary Witch Humor |
| Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Deadly Cemetery Jokes | Haunted House Humor | Werewolf Jokes |

| Scary Animal Jokes | Bat Puns | Bigfoot Sightings | 2 | Spider | Zombie Jokes | Brain Puns | 2 |
| Vampire Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Vampire Arts | Bloody Funny | 2 | Friday the 13th Humor |
| Scary Funny Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | Frightful Pick-Up Lines |
| Scary Days | Old Never Die Jokes | Clown Jokes | Chilling Winter Humor | Holiday Party Jokes |

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| Men's Hair Puns | Pirate Jokes | Police Puns | Psychic Jokes | Sci-Fi Jokes | Seasonal Humor | Snake Puns |
| Sock Puns | Sports Jokes | Star Trek Jokes | Superman Puns | Thunderstorm Jokes | Underwear LOLs | Wig Puns |

Painful Jokes & Groaner Puns Bartender Puns, Bar HumorAnimal Puns, Wildlife Humor
Monstrously Funny PunsOld Jokes & Old Never Die Puns Pot Puns, Weed Jokes, Green Grow-ners!

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