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Poultry
Puns, KFC Jokes, Tasty Turkey Humor
Dine
on plucking funny poultry puns, drumstick jokes, grilled humor
and fried chicken laughs.
Chicken Wing Jokes, McNugget Puns, Fry-Day LOLs
(Because Thigh Jokes, Leg Laughs,
and the Breast Puns Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream
If You're Trying to Wing It!) |
Warning:
Wing It with Caution! Buckets of chicken jokes, fried hen humor,
and finger-licking good puns ahead.
| Poultry Jokes | Egg
Jokes | Butcher Jokes | Steak
Jokes | Beef Jokes | 2
| Pork Jokes | BBQ
|
| Deli Jokes | Hamburger
Puns | Hot Dog LOLs | Ketchup
Jokes, Mustard Puns | Herb | Soup
|
| Colorado Cuisine | Tex-Mex
Jokes | Seafood Puns | Pirate
Eats | Cop Cuisine | Breakfast
LOLs |
| Chef Jokes | Chef
Tunes | Gnome Chef Jokes | Chef
Come-Ons | Foodie Humor | Waiter
Jokes |
Q.
Who's haunting the KFC across the street from Littleton
cemetery?
A. Some comedian spoofing Colonel Sanders said it was a
poultry-geist.
Q.
What did the head chef say to chew out the new guy?
A. This duck is so raw that it's still trying to sell me
life insurance!
Q.
Where did Neanderthals get their fast food chicken?
A. At Cave FC. |
Cooking
Point to Ponder: Can free range chicken be cooked
on a stove you bought?
Cooking
Tip of the Day: When the chef ran out of poultry spice,
he just winged it.
Q.
What do you need to eat an entire bucket of KFC chicken?
A. Hendurance.
Customer:
There's a fly in my chicken soup!
Waiter: Force of habit, sir. Our chef used to be a tailor.
|
Fast
Food Pick Up Line: Hey Chick,
did you just come from KFC? 'Cause your thighs and breast
are giving me a drumstick!
Q.
Who is haunting the KFC near Littleton Cemetery?
A. Locals know it's actually cannibal Alferd Packer because
he just doesn't have a taste for chicken meat.
Q.
How can you tell if chicken wings are virgins?
A. They are not if they have the bone in. |
Q.
What does it take to be a great poultry chef?
A. It boils down to beating the other chefs to the cutting
edge recipes.
Q.
What is the favorite tune of the wannabe KFC cook?
A. I Believe I Can Fry.
Q.
How are KFC customers and Hannibal Lecter alike?
A. Both love fingers.
I
made some Jerk Chicken the other day, but he didn't even
say, "Thanks." |
Q.
What do you get if you cross a chic fashion doll with a
grill?
A. Barbie Q Chicken.
Poultry
Point to Ponder: Are chickens cheeper by the dozen?
Q.
Why did KFC hire geneticists to edit chicken DNA?
A. R&D wanted something CRISPR
Q.
Why did the power go out at KFC?
A. Because the circuits were fried.
|
Pick
Up a Poultry Chef Line: Hey big guy, wanna dip your
wings in my Buffalo sauce?
Q.
What do you call somebody who steals a poultry dish out
of your oven?
A. Chicken Pot Pirate.
Q.
Who wrote the cookbook, Japanese Grilled Chicken Recipes?
A. Terr E. Yaki.
Q.
Why aren't there many good Buffalo wings jokes?
A. Because they're a bit too saucy for some. |
Q. Why did the rock drummer go to KFC?
A. He needed some drumsticks.
Q.
When is chicken soup not good for you?
A. When you are the chicken...
Q.
What happened before the young chef was hired as a fry cook
at KFC?
A. The assistant manager grilled him.
Clucking
Funny New Slogan at KFC:
All that's missing is the U.
Q.
What do you get if you cross a chicken and a ghost?
A. A poultry-geist. |
Urban Poultry Point to Ponder: If you have backyard chickens
and take care of them, are you a chicken tender?
The
chef flew into a rage with his new waiter. "Didn't I tell
you to notice when the chicken soup boiled over?" The waiter
replied, "I did it was at 4:25."
Q.
Why do bulimics eat at KFC?
A. Because the chicken comes in a handy bucket.
Customer:
There isn't any chicken in this chicken soup!
Blonde Waiter: Duh, there's no horse in the horseradish,
either.
|
Q.
Where does a rooster find the best recipes?
A. In the Betty Cocker Cookbook.
Q.
Which R&B funk tribute band only plays at KFC restaurants?
A. Earth, Wind, and Fryer!
Q.
What should you do if you don't like the corn at KFC?
A. Blame the Kernel.
Customer:
This chicken is nothing but skin and bones.
Waiter: Sorry sir, I didn't know you wanted feathers with
that. |
Q. How do you grill a chicken?
A. Repeatedly ask her why she crossed the road last night.
Q.
What did the hen do when she saw boxed take-out chicken?
A. She kicked the bucket.
The
roast chicken dinner I was cooking for my family was going
to be a surprise, but the fire truck ruined it...
Q.
What is chicken pot pie?
A. Three favorite things on the menu at the Colorado edibles
cafe. |
Q.
Why did Mozart fry all his chickens?
A. Because when he asked them who the best composer was,
they all said: "Bach, Bach, Bach."
Paultry
Poultry Pick-Up Line: Hey Penny, do you eat chicken? 'Cause
you can suck my cock.
Q.
What happens when two chefs have a poultry cooking contest?
A. The heat is on!
Q.
How are popcorn and KFC alike?
A. Both have greasy old kernels.
|
Q. What do a plastic surgeon and a chicken farmer have in
common?
A. Both can supply big breasts.
Q.
Why did the chicken just jump into the soup pot?
A. The farmer's wife told her it was a Jacuzzi.
Q.
What does the chef say when a goose dinner he makes completely
satisfies a tyrannical ruler?
A. It hit despot.
Q.
What do popcorn, water, KFC chicken and ice all have in
common?
A. They're all on somebody's bucket list. |
Q.
What's the difference between chickens and turkeys in November?
A. Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving.
Funny
Culinary Tip of the Day: Did you know that good gravy is
baste on turkey drippings?
Q.
What did the turkey say on Thanksgiving?
A. Real men eat beef!
Q.
What do you get if you cross a turkey and a banjo?
A. A musical instrument that can pluck itself.
Q.
Why didn't the turkey have dessert on Thanksgiving?
A. Because he was stuffed.
Q.
Why did the cranberries turn red?
A. Because they saw the turkey dressing. |
Q.
What do meat-eaters call it if you serve tofu turkey on
Thanksgiving?
A. Pranksgiving.
Q.
What is a turkey's favorite Thanksgiving dessert?
A. Peach Gobbler.
Q.
Why do pirates like to be on shore leave for Thanksgiving?
A. They're always asked to caRRRve the turkey!
Q.
How can you tell the Thanksgiving chefs are have a very
serious discussion?
A. They're talking turkey.
A
guy went to a big turkey dinner with a taxidermist friend
of his. By the end of the evening, he was stuffed!
Q.
What do you call distrusting a turkey days before Thanksgiving?
A. A well thawed out plan. |
Yes,
I know you want me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes, but
I just can't stop cold turkey!
Q.
Which movie was about a typical family haunted by a turkey?
A. Poultrygeist.
Q.
What did the hen turkey say to her naughty kids on Thanksgiving?
A. If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his
gravy!
Q.
What do you call a turkey on the day after Thanksgiving?
A. Lucky!
Q.
What happened when the turkey got into a fight?
A. He got the stuffing knocked out of him! |
|
Poultry Jokes | Butcher
Jokes | Steak Jokes | Beef
Jokes | 2 | Pork
Jokes | BBQ Grill Jokes |
| Deli Jokes | Burger
Puns | 2 | 3
| Hot Dog LOLs | Ketchup
Jokes, Mustard Puns | Herb | Soup
|
| Colorado Cuisine | Tex-Mex
Jokes | Seafood Puns | Pirate
Eats | Cop Cuisine | Breakfast
Jokes |
| Chef Jokes | 2
| 3 | 4
| 5 | Chef
Tunes | Gnome Chef Jokes | Chef
Come-Ons | Foodie Humor |
| Gourmet Grins | Dinner
Jokes | Lunch LOLs | Kitchen
Gadget Jokes | Nut Jokes | Old
Chef LOLs |
| Restaurant Jokes | 2
| 3 | Italian
Food | 2 | 3
| Pizza Jokes | Pasta
Puns | Take Out Food |
| Egg Jokes | Milk
| Butter | Cheese
Jokes | Cheese Gnomes | Ice
Cream | Cookie Candy Puns |
|
Carrot Jokes | Corn
| Peppers | Pickle
Puns | 2 | 3
| Potato | Salad
| Tomato Jokes | Veggies
|
| Fruit Humor | 2
| 3 | Apple
Jokes | Banana Funs | 2
| 3 | Lemon
| Orange Puns | Strawberry
|
| Baker Jokes | 2
| Bread | Dessert
Puns | 2 | Pie
| Beverage | Coffee
| 2 | Soda
| Beer | Wine
|
| Snack Jokes | Halloween
Treats | Tasty Cannibal Jokes
| Sci-Fi Food Jokes | Green
Munchies |
| Diet Puns | Gnome
Diet Jokes | Vegetarian Jokes, Vegan Puns
| Fitness and Dieting Jokes
| 2 |
You're
still chicken out
the laughs, so here's even more roasted
humor,
cooked grins, fried
jokes and grilled painful puns
that are just ducky:
|
More
Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...
|
Chicken Jokes | Circus
Jokes | Colorado Jokes | Craft
Beer Jokes | Dating Jokes |
Friday Puns | Gym
Jokes |
| Hipster Jokes | Lost
In Space Puns | Music Jokes | Poker
Jokes | Psychic Jokes | Religion
Jokes | Road Jokes |
| Sci-Fi Jokes | Seasonal
Puns | Sports Jokes | Thanksgiving
Jokes | Travel Jokes | Turf
Jokes | Weed Jokes |
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