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Painful Puns & Jokes That Grow On You
Plant a bumper crop of garden memes, green humor, and corny plant jokes!

Flora-ble Puns, Garden Jokes, Green Riddles
(Because Healthy Homegrown Humor Could Never Become Too Mainstream)
Warning: Proceed at your own risk. You never know what lurks in the bushes or weed.
Blooming Funny Garden Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |

Q. Why didn't anyone laugh at the gardener's jokes? A. Because they were too corny!Q. How do crazy people go through the woods? A. They take the psycho path.Q. What is the difference between one yard and two yards? A. A Fence!

Q. What do you call a grumpy, short-tempered gardener?
A. A Snap Dragon.

Q. What do you get if you cross a four-leaf clover with poison ivy?
A. A rash of good luck.

Q. Why did the gardener need a cork?
A.  His garden sprung a leek!

What do you call young married spiders? Newly WebsQ. What kind of socks does a gardener wear? A. Garden Hose!Garden Gnomenclature: Gnomes & Gnomettes

Q. Why do spiders make good baseball players?
A. Because they know how to catch flies.

Q. Why did the gardener quit?
A. His celery wasn’t high enough.

Q. Why was the gardener so busy over the weekend?
A. He had a really long Honeydew list.

Q. What do you call a cow eating grass? A. Lawn Moo-erQ. What kind of tree do fingers grow on? A. A Palm TreeWhat do you call a mushroom who buys a round of drinks? A Fun-Gi

Q. Why are husbands like lawn mowers?
A. They are difficult to get started, emit foul smells, and don't work half the time.

The winter was difficult on the trees, but in the spring they were re-leafed.

Q. Why do toadstools live so close together?
A. Because they don't need mushroom.

Gnome Sweat! We're here to move that planter.What is the difference between spinach & boogers? Kids won't eat spinach.Gnoming Green: Gnome & Hulk Before and After

Q. What did the big flower say to the small flower?
A. What's up, bud?

Q. What does the Green Giant wear when he goes to a corporate board meeting?
A. A three peas suit.

I caught these potatoes smoking weed. One could say that they're baked potatoes.

Blooming Funny Garden Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |

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ou've lasted this far, so here's even more growing laughter,
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