Q. What do you call a grumpy, short-tempered gardener?
A. A Snap Dragon.
Why did the guy quit his job making furniture out of plants?
A. Because it was no bed of roses.
Green Thought of the Day: Gardening is cheaper than therapy,
plus you get bouquets of roses!
How do botanists catch bartenders?
A. With barbates.
life without dreams is like a garden without flowers.
Pick-Up Line: Hey baby,
if you were a flower, I'd pick you!
Which kind of flower generates energy?
A. A power plant.
What did the bee say to the flower?
A. Hi there, Honey.
What is a wholesale flower salesman called?
A. A petal-er.
Q. What do gardeners call white-flowering shrubs that are
A. Mere myrtles.
Why couldn't the botanist see well without glasses?
A. Due to a-stigma-tism.
It and Reap" is funny, but if you accidentally pull out
your wife's flowers it's: "Weed It and Weep," and
that's not funny at all.
Why did the flower wreck its car?
A. The brake petal was missing.
What is it called when a flower gives head?
Which kind of flower can whistle the best?
What to flower BFFs call each other?
What do you call it when a flower uses a phone?
A. A cauliflower.
Odd Point to Ponder: If you keep receiving bouquets of flowers
with their heads cut off, do you have a stalker?
Why did the gardener have to wear sunglasses?
A. Because she grew sunflowers!
Year's resolution for the bankrupt gardener was to forget
the past, and rely on the fuchsia...
What does alpha letter "A" have in common with an aster
A. They both have bees coming after them.
Thumb Come-On: Hey girl,
is your name Daisy? 'Cause I want to plant you right here.
How do flowers drive on by so fast?
A. They just put the petal to the metal.
How are flowers and children alike?
A. You can't pick either at the park.
What do you call a large blooming pervert plant that loves
A. A petat-file.
Which literary period was known for flowery poetry?
A. The Romance Era.
Why was botany Hitler's favorite subject?
A. Because botany is all about Germination!