Q.
What do you say to compliment a vegetable gardener?
A. Smashing Pumpkins!
Q.
What do you say to an Iowa farmer whose crop is knee-high
by the 4th of July?
A. Corn-gratulations!
Q.
What is the most awesome veggie at your local farmer's market?
A. The RAD-ish.
Q.
What does a rancher say to compliment his best gal?
A. Hey Bess, you've got beautiful calves.
Equine
Chat Up Compliment: Hey there, I bet the other donkeys are
jealous 'cause that's one fine ass.
Q.
What co you say to compliment a Pachyderm?
A. You are looking Ella-phant-astic.
Q.
What is the creedo of the demolition crew?
A. Flattery is a powerful tool.
Q.
Why is the flowing slogan at the nuclear weapons facility?
A. Flattery is powerful.
Today's
Intoxicating Compliment: Hey babe, I'm not drunk. I'm just
intoxicated by your beauty. |
Flatter
Your Way Out of a JamLine: No Officer, I'm not drunk. I'm
just intoxicated by the amazing six-pack under your vest.
Q.
What complimentary term describes a judge who is exceptionally
honest?
A. Tried and true.
Incredible
Flattery Line: Hey dude, is your name Hulk? 'Cause you are
really smashing.
Superman
Flattery Line: Hey girl, they say I can do just about anything,
but I wish I could look as good as you do.
Q.
Which prestigious and coveted trophy did the firefighter
get at the Fireman's Ball?
A. The Extinguished Service Award.
Q.
What do you call the heroic fireman who was featured on
the evening TV news?
A. Flamous.
Q.
Why was the lawn crew at the Denver Broncos' stadium given
the Best in Grass Award?
A. Because they were out standing in their field.
Q.
What flattering award is given to the horse who drank the
most water?
A. A nice little trough-y. |
Q.
What does a chef say to flatter a hot dish?
A. Hey babe, you remind me of my spice cabinet because you've
got a fine grind goin' on!
Q.
Why was the restaurant called Out of This World?
A. Because it was famous for unidentified frying objects.
Vegetarian
Chef Pick Up Line: Hey girl, if you were a veggie, you'd
be one cute-cumber!
Q.
How do you flatter a cat lady?
A. Tell her she's meow-valous and purrr-fect.
Q.
How do you compliment a friendly polar bear?
A. Tell him he's an ice guy.
Q.
What did the famous snake get from his admirers?
A. Fang letters.
Q.
How did the male elephant find a female elephant?
A. Very attractive.
Q.
Why do visitors enjoy flattey jokes at PainfulPuns?
A. Because they're dually complimtary and complementary.
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