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Cannabis
Poems, Herb Quips, Poetic Pot Puns
Joint us for blunt poetry, marijuana mantras, catchy cannabis quotes and
spliffy stoner slogans.
Pot Poetry, Marijuana Mantras, Weed Slogans
(Because Stoners Agree, Cannabis
Poetry, Could Not Be, TOO Mainstream or Lovely,
and Potheads Don't Haiku!) |
Warning:
Weed On with Caution! Marijuana Matters, Weed Is Nature's
Poetry, and Poetic Cannabis-isms Ahead!
|
Pot Poetry, Marijuana Mantras | Ganja
Music Jokes | Pot Party Puns |
Weedy Funny Munchies |
| Weed Jokes and Cannabis Puns | 2
| 3 | 4 | 5
| 6 | 7 | 8
| 9 | 10 | 11
| Blunt Weed Humor | 2
|
| Legal Weed Jokes | Colorado
Cannabis Jokes | Mile High Buzz
| Stoner Pick-Up Lines | 2
| 3 |
| Incredible Green Hulk |
Spaced Out Aliens | Gnome
Grown Weed LOLs | Gnome Pothead Puns
|
| Funny Stoner Monkeys | 2
| Animal Pothead Puns | Weed
Light Bulb Jokes | Happy 420 Jokes
|
Poetic
Colorado Cannabis-ism: A friend with weed is a friend indeed!
Poetic
Cannabis Slogan of the Day: Don't panic, it's organic!
Cannabis
Poetry: We smoke pot and we like it a lot.
Q.
What do you call poetry by a pigeon out in a marijuana field?
A. High Coo!
Pothead
Point to Ponder: If you laugh at funny weed jokes, but groan
at pot poetry puns, do you have high standards? |
Herb
is the gift from the earth, and nothing worse, so before
you knock it try it first, to see it's a blessing
and not a curse!
Poetic
Stoner Pick-Up Line: Hey
iWeed, you must be as dope as pot seed, because
right now you're all I need.
Q.
What is it called when a Japanese poet smokes weed and then
overthrows the Shogun?
A. High Coup.
Q.
Which Kind of cannabis is the best you can find?
A. Yes, it really is intense and one-of-a-kind!
|
When
you smoke the herb, it reveals you to yourself. –
Bob Marley
Classic
420 Cannabis Slogan: As a part of a balanced breakfast,
don't forget your Weedies!
Colorado
Tourism Slogan: Weed like to welcome you.
Q.
What do Denverites call poetry by a mourning doves hanging
around a marijuana grow house?
A. High Coo!
Marijuana
Mantra of the Day: Join the marijuana movement, it's a joint
effort. |
Stoner
Poetry Pick-Up Line: You
must be as dope as weed, because right now you're all I
need.
Colorado
Legal Pot Poetry: I like to smoke that lovely grass, so
all you Feds can kiss my ass.
Baked
Quote of the Day: Of course I know how to roll a joint.
– Martha Stewart. |
Potted
Poem of the Day: If everybody did a bong, and toked a bunch
of weed, we'd all get along, that is agreed!
To
make marijuana against the law is like saying God made a
big mistake. – Bill Hicks.
Q.
What do stoners always take along when hunting for clarity
in Colorado?
A. Deep thoughts and High-powered contact lenses.
|
Smokin'
Poetic 420 Quip: If you don't like weed puns, you're ganja
have a bad time.
Shortest
Stoner Poem: Weed.
The
biggest killer on the planet is stress and I still think
the best medicine is an always has been cannabis. –
Willie Nelson.
Poetic
Stoner Wisdom of the Day: Green ganja grass really kicks
your ass. |
Colorado
Cannabis Point to Ponder: Why isn't there a network sitcom
or even a cable reality show about a Denver pot shop?
That
is not a drug. It's a leaf. – Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Potted
Poem Pick-Up Line: Hey hottie,
you are no longer a Chonger because you
already toke my breath away! |
If
laughter is the best medicine and marijuana makes you laugh,
doesn't that make marijuana the best medicine?
It
makes me feel the way I need to feel. – Snoop
Dogg.
Red,
Green, Blue 420 Point to Ponder: In dog years, Willie Nelson
is 420, isn't he?
|
Herb
is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction.
– Bob Marley.
Colorado
Cannabis-ism Mantra: Help eradicate road rage in our lifetime!
Q.
Why don't little green men get into arguments?
A. Because they always take the high road! |
So
Stoner Poetry: Yo planted a seed, so you got cha some
weed.
Pot
Poetry Pick-Up Line: Hey
Mick, you're such a hot pick, that I don't even need my
Bic!
Pothead
Poem of the Day: I smoke pot. Yes, I think I smoke a lot.
Q.
What does THC stand for?
A. Toke, Hold, Cough. |
Poetic
Stoner Pick-Up Line: Hey
hottie, come on along and bring your bong.
Stoner
Pick-Up Line: Hey, I wanna
TH-See you naked!
Colorado
Cannabis-ism Slogan: Weed. It's not just for glaucoma any
more!
Q.
Which cheesy sitcom would be way funnier if it was about
physicists smoking weed?
A. The Big Bong Theory.
|
Smokey
Pot Poetry: Puff puff. That's enough.
Poetic
Stoner Pick-Up Line: Hey
Bud, my hydroponics grow can put your mind in the know.
Pointed
Pothead Poetry Point to Ponder: Orange you glad nothing
rhymes with joint?
Hot
Blunt Pick-Up Line: Thank
goodness I'm wearing gloves, because Maryjane, you're just
way too hot to handle. |
Poetic
Stoner Pick-Up Line: Hey
let's go smoke some weed. Two puffs is all you'll need.
Mile
High 420 Marijuana Mantra of the Day: Just Doob It!
Poetic
Stoner Pick-Up Line: High,
wanna come along and smoke my bong?
Classic
Colorado 420 Slogan: Can I be blunt? |
Weed
Poetry: When you pack it tight, a blunt is a wondrous sight.
Poetic
Pot Pick-Up Line: Hi hottie,
do you smoke weed? 'Cause weed be great together
is all I plead.
Cavemen
discover fire.
Cavemen discover weed.
Welcome to the Stone Age.
|
Poetic
Stoner Chef Pick-Up Line:
Hi there, is your name Pot? 'Cause you are so hot!
Nostalgic
Colorado Cannabis-ism Slogan from the 1990s: Weed my
lips!
Mile
High Marijuana Mantra: Hey Colorado, let's blow this joint!
Classic
Colorado Skier Pick-Up Line:
Hey girl, wanna get up-lifted and go for a whirl? |
|
Poetry Jokes | Author
Jokes, Literary Puns, Library Humor | 2
| 3 | 4
| 5 |
Author Unknown |
| Pot Poetry, Marijuana Mantras |
Ganja Music Jokes | Pot
Party Puns | Weedy Funny Munchies
|
| Weed Jokes and Cannabis Puns | 2
| 3 | 4 | 5
| 6 | 7 | 8
| 9 | 10 | 11
| Blunt Weed Humor | 2
|
| Legal Weed Jokes | Colorado
Cannabis Jokes | Mile High Buzz
| Stoner Pick-Up Lines | 2
| 3 |
| Incredible Green Hulk |
Spaced Out Aliens | Gnome
Grown Weed LOLs | Gnome Pothead Puns
|
| Funny Stoner Monkeys | 2
| Animal Pothead Puns | Weed
Light Bulb Jokes | Happy 420 Jokes
|
You've jingled this far, so
here's more rhythmic laughter,
poetic humor,
well-versed jokes and ode-ful
painful puns that don't rhyme
most of the time:
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More
Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...
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Blonde Jokes | Chef
Jokes | Colorado Jokes | Colorado
Munchies | Craft Beer Puns |
Fit Jokes | Farmer
Jokes |
| Gambling Jokes | Green
Puns | Guy Jokes | Happy
Hour LOLs | Hipster Jokes | Light
Bulb Jokes | Music Memes |
| Oh Crap! | Outer
Space Jokes | Pirate Jokes | Police
Puns | Sasquatch Jokes | Saturday
Jokes | Scary Humor |
| Sci-Fi Jokes | Seasonal
Puns | Sports Jokes | Tech
Gadget Jokes | Travel Jokes | Weather
Jokes | Web Jokes |
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