|
Battery
Jokes, Humor Jolts, Portable Power Puns
Charge
up with re-volting humor, plugged in puns, lithium-powered laughs and
energizing jokes.
Battery Jokes: Positive Puns, Negative Humor
(Because Acidic Battery Jokes
and Powerful Puns Could Never Be TOO Mainstream,
Even At NO Charge!) |
Warning:
Proceed With Caution! Juicy battery jokes, powerful humor, and criminally
funny puns ahead!
| Battery Jokes and Fully Charged Puns
| Electric Humor, Powerful Puns, Shocking
Jokes |
| Computer Jokes, Laptop Laughs, 404
PC Puns | 1 | 2
| 3 | 4 | High
Tech Gadget Jokes |
| Internet Jokes, Web Puns, Net Humor
| Social Media Jokes, Twitter Jokes,
Facebook Puns |
| Web Dating Jokes | Cell
Phone Jokes, Smart Phone Puns | Telephone
Jokes, Pole Puns | 2 |
Q.
What's the difference between a battery and a politician?
A. The battery has a positive side.
Q.
What happens if the Engergizer bunny puts his batteries
in backward?
A. He keeps coming and coming...
The
battery comedian said: "Anode you'd like these powerful
Painful Puns!"
Q.
What did the juiced-out battery say to the cop waiting outside
the bar?
A. Feel free to charge me.
Q.
Why did the judge stop the business merger between Moron's
and Duracell?
A. 'Cause he could not allow a salt and battery
in his courtroom. |
Q.
Why did the blonde sleep with a battery under her pillow?
A. She wanted to take a power nap.
Q.
How do you describe the downtime while your batteries are
recharging?
A. Re-volting!
Battery:
Doc, am I being billed twice because I'm bipolar?
Shrink: No, sir. Right there it says you are rechargeable.
Powerful
Point to Ponder: Why don't we find recharging batteries
revolting?
Q.
Why did the battery salesman quit his job?
A. He no longer got a charge out of it.
|
Q.
Why shouldn't you be sad if your flashlight battery dies?
A. Because you're de-lighted!
Battery-Powered
Point to Ponder: When your battery runs out, is that because
it's had it with you?
Q.
What did the battery say when asked how he did so well in
the tech industry?
A. I've got contacts, you know.
Q.
Why is the life of a battery so brutal?
A. 'Cause either you're working, or you're dead...
Q.
Why did the guy quit his job in the battery factory?
A. It was not a powerful enough position. |
Q.
Why did the blonde call AAA when her laptop battery died?
A. Well, duh!
Q.
What happened at today's AA meeting?
A. The new guy said, "Hi my name is EverEd, and I'm
a battery."
Q.
What does the Batmobile run on in the 21st Century?
A. Batteries.
Patient:
Doc, I get really angry when my phone battery dies. What
can I do?
Shrink: I suggest you find an outlet.
Q.
How much should dead batteries cost?
A. Nothing, 'cause they're free of charge! |
Q.
What did the battery say on his dating profile?
A. I'm very energetic and positive, but I also have a negative
side.
Q.
How can you tell if your battery is going to be good today?
A. It says, "I'm feeling positive."
Energizing
Point to Ponder: If you sleep on your battery charger, is
that considered a power nap?
Q.
How do you pick out a dead battery in a pile of good ones?
A. It's the one with no spark.
Q.
How are a bull and a battery alike?
A. Both charge!
|
Q.
What did the depleted battery say to the judge?
A. Just go ahead and charge me!
Q.
Which circus act does powerful Batman enjoy most?
A. The Acro-bat-teries!
Q.
Why did the cheating husband add his secret lover to his
phone contacts as "LOW BATTERY?"
A. If she calls, his wife just plugs the phone into its
charger.
Robin:
Holy Batman! The BatRemote to the BatTV isn't working.
Batman: Did you check the Batteries?
Robin: What are teries? |
Q.
What is a group of cave-dwelling mammals that can power
things called?
A. A bat-array.
Q.
Why does an unused battery feel so sad?
A. It's never included in anything!
Q.
Why did the burned out guy tell his shrink that he feels
like a flashlight with a burned out battery?
A. He claimed his inner light died a long time ago.
Did
you hear about the guy whose watch batteries died? He wound
up at a clock shop!
Have
you seen the new Dr. Barbie doll? It operates on
batteries!
Power
Point to Ponder: Is yawning the human equivalent to "low
battery?"
Q.
What does Dracula's torch run on?
A. Bat-teries.
Q.
How did the guy feel after the dentist gave him a battery-powered
toothbrush?
A. Electrified. |
When
the power goes out and you can't recharge everything, just
remember your cat does not require batteries.
Q.
What did the battery say after being recharged at his AA
meeting?
A. I am feeling positive!
Q.
What happened to the hood who beat me up with my phone charger?
A. He was charged with assault with a battery.
Q.
How do you know an old battery still has some hot
life left in it?
A. It teases you to test it to get you to lick it.
Q.
Why didn't the troubled guy bother to go see his shrink
when his flashlight batteries died?
A. Because he was feeling delighted.
Point
to Ponder: Why is it that flashlights are such a convenient
place
to store dead batteries?
Did
you hear about the bull caught in an electric fence? Yeah,
it was charging. |
Q.
What happened to the thug who beat up some guy with his
dead cell phone?
A. He was charged with battery.
Today's
Powerful Tech Point to Ponder: Don't you just hate it when
you have a smart device with a dumb battery?
Q.
How did the blonde know her relationship was over?
A. Her battery ran out on her.
Q.
What's the difference between a phone battery and a robo
call?
A. The battery has a positive side.
Q.
How did the potato chip proposition the battery?
A. If you're Eveready, I'm Frito Lay.
Q.
Why didn't the battery finish the marathon?
A. It RAN out of power.
It's very sad when your phone battery lasts longer than
your relationship does.
I
just gave all my dead batteries away – free of charge.
|
|
Battery Jokes and Fully Charged Puns
| Electric Humor, Powerful Puns, Shocking
Jokes |
| Computer Jokes, Laptop Laughs, 404
PC Puns | 1 | 2
| 3 | 4 | High
Tech Gadget Jokes |
| Internet Jokes, Web Puns, Net Humor
| Social Media Jokes, Twitter Jokes,
Facebook Puns |
| Online Dating Jokes | Cell
Phone Jokes, Smart Phone Puns | Telephone
Jokes, Pole Puns | 2 |
| Engineering Jokes, Genius Puns, Innovative
Invention Humor | Renewable Energy
Jokes |
| Robot Jokes, AI Tech Bot Puns, Robotics
Humor | Mars Rover Jokes | Robot
Pick-Up Lines |
| Cyber Jokes |
Light Bulb Jokes | 2 | 3
| 4 | 5
| 6 | 7
| 8 | 9
| 10 | Light
Bulb Zodiac Riddles |

You've lasted this
long, so here's even more lithium-powered
humor,
super-charged jokes, and electrifying
painful puns to energize your
day:
|
More
Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...
|
Android Jokes | Batman
Jokes | Bigfoot Jokes | Car
Jokes | Chef Jokes | Colorado
Jokes | Craft Beer Jokes |
| Dating Jokes | Hairy
Puns | Hamburger Puns | Hipster
Jokes | Music Jokes | Pirate
Puns | Prison Jokes |
| Science Puns | Sci-Fi
Jokes | Sports Jokes | Tennis
Jokes | Ufology Jokes |
USA State Jokes | Wife
Jokes |
Thanks
for stopping by and see you again soon!
Join
us on social media and please
feel free to share our memes with friends and family:
©2017-2021
Painfulpuns.com
All rights reserved. |
|
|