Q. How many actors does it take to change a light bulb? A. Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight!   PainfulPuns.com - Puns, Jokes, Word Play, Groaners, Ouch!

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Q. What was teh transvestite rooster's stage name? A. Dawn!
Isn't it ironic that the Pirates of the Carribean DVD includes a piracy warning?
Q. What show do pastry chefs watch on HBO? A. Game of Scones: All Men Must Die!

 


Actor Puns, Center Stage Humor, Film Jokes
Get with the program! Funny movie humor, television show jokes, and moving picture puns.

Acting Jokes, TV Show Humor, Dramatic Puns
(Because Hammy Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream if You're At the Comedy Club or Deli Counter!)
Warning: Over-reACT with Caution! Circus jokes, play acting humor, and mimes ahead – no joke!
| Actor Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Mime Jokes | Actor Pick-Up Lines | Magician Puns | Gnomes Acting Up |
| Creepy Clown Jokes and Circus Humor | Standup Comedian Jokes | Funny Jokes About Jokes |
| Television Jokes, TV Show Puns | Film Jokes, Movie Title Puns | Stage Actor Humor, Play Puns |
| Dancer Jokes, Disco Humor, Dance Puns | Music Jokes | Guitar Player Puns | Colorado Music |

Q. How many performance artists does it take to change a light bulb? A. Dunno, I left after the first hour and a half!Q. Why did the Broadway play close? A. Because it had scene better days!Q. What is a heckler's favorite slogan? A. Just boo it!

Q. Which Florida city is the favorite of pantomimists?
A. Mime-Me.

Q. What is a mime's favorite time of the day?
A. Dusk, because all the colors are muted.

Q. Was it hard for James Bond to steal secret plans for the new dastardly weapon?
A. No. It was easy as spy.

Q. Was there ever a great movie about hotdogs?
A. Yes, there was one Oscar Weiner.

Q. What do you call a famous fictional spy who makes a ton of movies?
A. A high-yield Bond.

Q. Why do actors always make good pool players?
A. Because they know all the cues.

Q. What type of jokes are these?
A. Pun-to-mimes.

Unanswered Riddle: If a mime got locked in a walk-in freezer, would anybody know he needs help?

Q. What is the name of the new documentary film about the famous dancer, Fred?
A. Astaire IS Born.

Q. How many jugglers does it take to change a light bulb? A. One, but it takes at least three light bulbs!Q. Which child actress was bratty and bad tempered at times? A. Surly Temple!Q. Which veggie is the favorite of actor Kurt? A. Russell's Sprouts!

Q. Why did the circus lion eat the tightrope walker?
A. Because he wanted a well-balanced meal.

Q. Which film about auto mechanics won an Oscar?
A. Lord of the Springs.

Q. What happened after the dancer was killed at the stripper bar?
A. Now the place is haunted with en-tities.

Q. Why are circus performers called artists?
A. Because they know how to draw a crowd!

Q. Why did the tap dancer quit?
A. Because he fell into the sink.

Q. Why did the vampire act so batty?
A. It was in his blood.

Old dancers never die, but they do step away.

Q. What happened to the kid who ran away with the circus?
A. The cops made him bring it back...

Q. How did Major Mime know the new guy was not cut out to be a mime?
A. It was something he said.

Q. What do you call it when a king has a question and needs to see a ballerina right away?
A. An immediate dancer.

What is a cucumber's favorite TV network? A. Pickleodeon!Happy Tubes Day!Q. What do you call it when you take pictures of the sprite in the tempest? A. Ariel Photography!

Q. What is a pickle's favorite classic movie?
A. To Dill a Mockingbird.

Q. What is a cucumber's favorite TV game show?
A. Let's Make a Dill!

Q. Where do television newscasters do their reporting?
A. Wherever they're stationed.

Q. Who is the most dangerous thespian in the average community theater presentation?
A. The actor who owns power tools.

Q. What do you call a blonde actress with two brain cells?
A. Pregnant.

Q. What did the TV anchorman do when he was told there was a pursuit in progress?
A. He cut to the chase.

Q. What is an alien's favorite Disney movie?
A. Snow White and the Red Dwarfs.

Q. What does an avid collector of classic films pass on to his heirs?
A. Serious reel estate.

Did you hear about the veteran TV anchorman who did not realize he was about to be fired? It was news to him. OUCH!

Q. Why was Santa cast in a musical? A. Because he had stage presents!Q. what do you call an old TV show by comedian Buttons or Skelton? A. AMime Mimes: Wow, Is It Boos-Day Again?

Q. What do you get if you cross a vampire and a circus performer?
A. A bloody entertaining act that goes straight for the juggler!

Q. Who does a movie star vampire get letters from?
A. Members of his fang club!

Q. How did the old Chippendale dancer die?
A. He lost his shirt.

Q. Why was Don Rickles so famous in classic comedy?
A. Because of his expert tease.

Q. How many actors does it take to wallpaper a room?
A. Three, if you slice their parts thinly enough.

Old go-go dancers never die, but they do get the boot.

Q. What is the favorite movie of mime sheep?
A. Silence of the Lambs.

Q. What is the first rule of Mime Club?
A. You do not talk about Mime Club.

Q. Who wrote the book, The Man Who Failed At Tight Rope Walking?
A. Sissy Roper.

| Actor Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Mime Jokes | Actor Pick-Up Lines | Magician Puns | Gnomes Acting Up |
| Creepy Clown Jokes and Circus Humor | Standup Comedian Jokes | Funny Jokes About Jokes |
| Television Jokes, TV Show Puns | Film Jokes, Movie Title Puns | Stage Actor Jokes, Play Puns |

| Vampire Performing Arts Puns | Artist Jokes | 2 | Hipster Jokes | Arty Hipster Pick-Up Lines |

| Photographer Jokes, Photography Humor | Museum Jokes | Colofrul Jokes | Designer Puns |

| Dancer Jokes, Disco Humor, Dance Puns | Music Jokes | Guitar Puns | Colorado Music Jokes |
| Singer Jokes, Vocalist Song Puns | Composer Jokes | Brass Music Jokes | Musician Come-Ons |
| Piano Jokes, Keyboard Puns | Rocking Rock 'N Roll Jokes | Rock Band Jokes | Drummer Jokes |
| Hip Hop Puns | Sax and Violins Puns | Chef Tunes | Scary Music Jokes | Sci-Fi Music Jokes |
| Musical Superhero Jokes | Weed Music Jokes | Wild Animal Music Beasts | Xmas Carol LOLs |

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You know your lines, so here's even more mimer chuckles, staged humor,
scripted jokes and dramatic painful puns that go for the juggler:

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| Sci-Fi Jokes | Seasonal Humor | Sports Jokes | Sunday Jokes | Travel Jokes | UFO Jokes | Wigged Out Puns |

Painful Jokes & Groaner Puns Bartender Puns, Bar Humor Frightful Puns, Scary Jokes
Old Jokes & Old Never Die Puns Crappy Puns & Sh*tty Jokes! Pot Puns, Weed Jokes, Green Grow-ners!

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