Music Pick-Up Line: I don't play guitar, but I'll pluck your G string!   PainfulPuns.com - Puns, Jokes, Word Play, Groaners, Ouch!

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Q. Which concert only costs 45 Cents? A. 50 Cent featuring Nickleback!
Q. Which music style do pirates enjoy most? A. ARRR and B!
Q. What happens when you play the blues backwards? A. Your wife comes back, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison!
Q. What is the difference between a fish & a guitar? A. You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish!
Happy Tunes Day!
Which music genre appeals to cheese? R 'N Brie
Are You Loving Blues Day!

 


Garage Band Puns and Band Musician Humor
Play along with funny band member jokes, duo laughs, trio humor and musical ensemble puns.

Band Jokes, Rock Group Puns, Ensemble LOLs
('Cause Funny Music Ensemble Jokes Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream When You're Trying to Name Your New Band!)
Warning: Audition with Caution! Jammin' band jokes, musician performance humor, and concerting puns ahead.
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Q. Who is Hulk's favorite band? A. Green Day!Wookie Asks: What makes music on your hair? A. A head band!Q. Which 1970s band do stoners still enjoy? A. The Doobie Brothers!

Q. Why did The Hulk flub his band audition?
A. Because he was so green.

Q. What is The Hulk's least favorite song?
A. Nobody Loves The Hulk by The Traits.

Did you hear about the group who does cover songs by Stone Temple Pilots, Rolling Stones and Stone Sour? They are a true rock band.

Q. Who is the most famous German jazz musician?
A. Jazz Hans.

Garage Band Come-On: Hey babe, if you were a berry, I'd want to jam with you all winter long!

Q. Which rock group has four guys that don't sing?
A. Mount Rushmore.

Q. Which R&B funk tribute band only plays in kitchens?
A. Earth, Wind, and Fryer!

Q. Why are rock band's members all such perverts?
A. Because the drummer sits in back beating it, the guitarist is fingering minors, the bassist is slapping it around and they all like the pianist.

Pick Up a Band Member Line: Baby, do you believe in love at first set? Or, should we play a little longer?

Q. Which band is an astronaut's favorite?
A. 30 Seconds to Mars.

Q. What is Donald Trump's least favorite classic rock band?
A. Foreigner.

Garage Band Fact of the Day: My neighbors listen to really good music, whether they like it, or not.

Q. Which musical instrument does a skeleton play in the band?
A. The trombone.

Garage Band Hookup Line: Hey girl, how 'bout we get together and make some sweet music together tonight?

Q. Why did the chicken join a band? A. Because it already had drumsticks!Q. What is Iceman's favorite band? A. Cold Play!Q. How do you make a band stand? A. Take away their chairs!

Q. How do you turn a duck into a soul artist?
A. Put it in the oven until its Bill Withers!

Q. What is a sheep's favorite pop group?
A. The Pet Sheep Boys.

Q. Which bands do sheep like dancing to?
A. Ewe 2 and Ewe B 40.

Q. What is the grand prize in today's time travel lottery?
A. A trip to see the Beatles perform Yesterday.

Q. If everybody around you is wild about big band music, where do you live?
A. In a swing state.

Q. What is the Green Goblin's favorite band?
A. Smashing Pumpkins.

Q. What do you call it when two musical groups try to outdo each other?
A. Band to band combat.

Q. How do you rate Smashing Pumpkins in your top 90s bands?
A. Less Than Jake, but Better Than Ezra.

Q. Which band is the favorite of those who suffer from Asthma?
A. Weezer.

Q. How did the band's stage performance go?
A. A chording to plan!

Q. What the the fan say about the band Depeche Mode?
A. I just can't get enough.

Q. Why do bands have bass players?
A. To translate for the drummer.

Q. What's the name of the Mexican Emo band?
A. Hispanic At The Disco.

Q. Which pious religious sect was founded by a member of the Beatles? A. The Lennonites.

Q. How did the audience feel when they saw Count Basie perform?
A. All jazzed up.

Q. What's the difference between a bull and a band? A. The bull has the orns in the front and the ass in the back!Q. Which instrument does a pirate play in the band? A. The Guitarrr!Q. What is Spider-Man's favorite band? A. The Spinners!

Q. Which classic rock band is the favorite of cows?
A. Moo-dy Blues.

Q. Which band is Dumbo's least favorite?
A. Cage the Elephant.

Q. What do you call someone who hangs around with a band?
A. The Drummer.

Q. What do you call a Mariachi band with just one member?
A. A Juan Man Band.

Stoner Groupie Pick-Up Line: Hey, I can be your buzz amplifier.

Q. What do you call a group of rogue Canadians that sails the sea, singing about looting and stealing?
A. 21 Pirates.

Q. What is Jackie Chan's favorite band?
A. Foo Fighters.

Q. Which classic rock band is the favorite of Jehovah's Witness?
A. The Doors!

Rock Trivia of the Day: The drug company's band called The Prevention never took off even though they thought they were better than The Cure.

Q. What happened when a jazz band's bus broke down on the busy highway during rush hour?
A. There was a massive jam up.

Q. Which rock band has members with obsessive-compulsive disorder?
A. OC/DC.

Q. What is the name of the all-skunk boy band?
A. The Back Streak Boys.

Q. What do rockers call the guy who gets the group out of PR scrapes?
A. A Band-Aide.

Q. What is Magneto's favorite band? A. Metallica!Q. What do you call it when a Wookiee plays guitar alone on stage? A. A Han Solo!Q. What is a locksmith's favorite band? A. The Monkees!

Q. What's the similarity between a drummer and a philosopher?
A. They both perceive time as an abstract concept.

Did you hear about the heavy metal guitarist who locked his keys in the car? He had to break the window to let the drummer out.

Q. What kind of music are balloons afraid of?
A. Pop Music!

Q. Why do copper musical instruments sound more powerful than brass in a band?
A. Because copper's a better conductor.

Q. Why are so many guitar jokes one-liners?
A. So the rest of the band can understand them.

Q. What is the name of the new all male country band?
A. The Chixie Dicks.

Q. What is Indiana Jones' least favorite band?
A. The Rolling Stones.

Q. Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?
A. No, but hum a few bars and I'll play it.

Q. Why did the pony win the county fair's battle of the bands?
A. 'Cause he was a rocking horse!

Q. Why haven't we heard about the new computer geek band called 999 Megabytes?
A. Because they haven't got a gig yet.

Q. Why did the band 999 Megabytes change their name to 1024 Megabytes?
A. So they'd always have a gig!

Q. Why was the amputee fired from the local garage band?
A. 'Cause he couldn't hold a note or carry a tune.

Q. What do you call somebody who hangs around with musicians? A. A Vocalist!Q. Which classic rock group sings about black and white cookies? A. Oreo Speedwagon!Q. What is the Human Torch's favorite band? A. Arcade Fire!

Q. Which new boy band only plays classical music?
A. The Bach Street Boys.

Q. Which band is the least favorite of Jesus?
A. Nine Inch Nails.

Q. Which 2010s band plays on the highest sugar levels?
A. The Diabeatles.

Q. How are an arguing married couple like a rock band in concert?
A. They always start out with some new stuff and then roll back to their greatest hits.

Q. What were the Beatles words of wisdom for insects?
A. Let It Bee.

Q. What can you do with a rubber trumpet?
A. Join an elastic band!

Q. Which brass band always stands in a puddle of drool during the Christmas season?
A. The Salivation Army Band.

Q. Which classic rock band is guaranteed to get a beehive buzzing?
A. Pollen Oates.

Q. What is a horny guy's favorite rock band to masturbate to?
A. The Strokes.

Q. Who is the drummer in the Mexican Beatles tribute band?
A. Gringo Starr.

Q. What is a nocturnal flying insect's favorite band?
A. Mothly Crue.

Q. Which classic rock band is the favorite of electricians?
A. AC/DC.

Q. Why does every band need a manager?
A. To offer sound advice.

Q. Why do you feel sad when you see a band pack up their gear after a big gig?
A. Because it's dis-concerting.

Q. How does Mr. Spock's favorite class rock song go?
A. Some people call me a space cowboy, some gangsters call me the Vulcan of Love...

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| Piano Jokes, Keyboard Puns | Rocking Rock 'N Roll Jokes | Rock Group Puns and Band Jokes |
| Scary Music Jokes | Sci-Fi Music Jokes | Singer, Vocalist, Song Jokes | Sax and Violins Puns |
| Musical Superhero Jokes | Weed Music Jokes | Wild Animal Music Beasts | Xmas Carol LOLs |
| Music Jokes, Musician Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | Musician Come-Ons |

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