Q. What is a steak pun?
A. A medium where anything well done is rare!

Q. Why are steaks so happy at barbeques?
A. They get to meet all their old flames.

Red Hot Steak Lovers Humor: Brought a new grill home last night. She's a real gas and she's really hot, especially after you turn her on!

Q. Why was the well-done steak's gossip so bad?
A. It wasn't juicy enough.

Q. Which kind of humor always leaves a beef steak cold?
A. Biting wit and gnawing puns!

Q. Do they serve T-bone steaks in Transylvania?
A. Only very rarely.

Q. Which beef steak can see into your future?
A. A Medium.

Q. What does a good beef steak have in common with sex?
A. They're both very rare.

Dear Steak, Hot coals are red, gas flames are blue, but when it comes to meat, all I want is you.

Q. How much do steak house patrons enjoy the all-you-can-eat buffet?
A. To the fullest.

Q. How can you tell if your beef steaks have a high I.Q.?
A. They loin fast.

Q. How far can steak go in school?
A. It can go to cowledge where it can get up to 450 degrees.

Q. What is the lowest grade of steak?
A. Where the rubber meets the road.

Steak Lover's Pick-Up Line: You're my grill and I'm your broil.

Carnivore Fact of the Day: Seven days without steak makes one weak.

I don't eat steak often, so when I do, it's a rare occasion.

Q. How can you tell if your steak enjoys classical music?
A. It frequents the Meatropolitan Opera House and Cownegie Hall!

Q. What did the beef steak gossip say to the pork chop?
A. Did you meet Frank's new girlfriend, Patty? I hear they're engaged to be marinated.

Q. What did the fired-up grill master say to the vegan?
A. Sorry, I can't listen to your rantings right now, while more important things are at steak.

Q. What did the Texas taxidermist do during his lunch break?
A. He stuffed his face with surf and turf at the local steak house.

Q. In which school subjects might the teacher say: "Well Done, Steaks?"
A. Meatyeval History and Meat-thematics.

Q. Why did the Colorado beef herd return to the cannabis field?
A. It was a classic case of the pot calling the cattle back. Plus, the steaks have never been higher!

Q. What spoiled the big Fourth of July beef steak BBQ?
A. When the mosquitoes next door dropped by for a bite.

Q. What is a T-bone steak lover's favorite song lyric?
A. Is it meat you're looking for?

Q. Who is a T-bone steak's all time favorite movie director?
A. Sizzle B. DeMille.

Q. Why did Darth Vader throw steaks at Luke Skywalker?
A. So he could meat his destiny!

Luke: What's for dinner, Dad?
Darth: Wookiee steak, but it's a little Chewy.

Q. How did young Darth Vader speed eat through his well-done steak dinner through his mask?
A. He was Force fed.

Q. Why did Darth Vader complain to the waiter about the T-bone steak he was served?
A. Not only was it chewie, but it was not at all on the Dark Side.

Q. Why does Darth Vader eat burnt toast with his well-done steak?
A. Because likes his dinner on the Dark Side.

Q. Where do cowboy chefs that spcialize in cooking rib eye steaks feel right at home?
A. On the range.

Q. Why were the rib eye steaks in the refrigerator embarrassed?
A. They saw the salad dressing.

Q. What do you call it when a steer is on stilts?
A. Raising the steaks!

Q. Why do steaks make such terrific baseball players?
A. Because they're great at the plate!

Q. What do vegans and vampires have in common?
A. They don't eat at stake houses.

S-A-L-A-D: That's a funny way to spell STEAK!

Q. What do you call a claim that a hungry man could eat a big T-bone steak in just one minute?
A. Hard to swallow.

Q. What is it called when a vegetarian reverts to eating steak again?
A. Losing one's veg-inity!

Q. What do you call a cow with one leg?
A. Steak.

Vegan: Do you know what veganism is?
Carnivore: Huh?!?
Vegan: It means no milk and no eggs.
Carnivore: Then how do you bread your steak?

Q. Which song lyric might you hear at the steak house chef's backyard barbeque party?
A. My grill, talking 'bout my grill, my grill.

Q. What did the cow say to the lady butcher?
A. You're making a big steak, Miss.

Q. How did the jury find the strip steak defendant?
A. Grill-ty as Charred!

Q. What is the slogan at the new bodybuilder gym that's exclusively for for rare steak eaters?
A. Beef-It!

Q. What did the grill master call the first draft of a new steak recipes cookbook? A. A menuscript.

A beefy guy wanted to take home the leftovers from the steak cookout, but somebody else foiled his plans.

Q. What do vegans call a dumb steak-eating omnivore?
A. A Meathead!

Q. What happens when two chefs have a steak grilling contest?
A. The heat is on!

Q. Where can you go for a veal steak at lunch time?
A. a calf-eteria.

Q. What did the turkey say on Thanksgiving?
A. Real men eat steak!

Q. Why are sizzling grilled steaks such brilliant actors?
A. They give meaty performances, especially if they're prime.

Beefy BBQ Point to Ponder: Why isn't there a chain of Elvis Presley steak houses? The slogan would be: For people who love meat tender.

Q. What did the guy say about his thoroughly cooked steak?
A. Job well done.

A vegetarian, ameat eater, and a cannibal go out to lunch. The veg orders a salad, and the meathead orders a medium-rare steak. But, the cannibal told the waiter, "I think I'll just wait 'til they're done."

Q. Why do people kill animals?
A. Fur convenience steak.

Q. Where do cowboys cooking up their hot beef steak feel right at home?
A. At. Chippendale's.

High Steaks Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, you're as steamy as a porterhouse steak sizzlin' on my hot BBQ grill.

Q. Why did the space alien throw beef steak at an asteroid?
A. He wanted a little meaty-or.

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