| Did
you know that farmers earn a meager celery, come home beet
and just want to read the pepper, turnip the covers and
endive into bed?
Q.
How did the farmer find his lost cow?
A. He tractor down.
Grain
farmers have a tough life. They barley survive wheat to
wheat.
When
the farmer's wife said she was leaving him because of his
unhealthy obsession with plants, he asked: "Where is
this stemming from, my sweet blossom?"
Today's
Bit of Farm Wisdom: Never throw in the trowel!
Farmer
Pick-Up Line: Hey baby,
I'd like to harvest you during peak season. |
Q.
Where does a farmer get his medicine?
A. At the farm-acy!
Retro
Hippie Farmer Thought of the Day: Bean thinking how up-beet
I yam about all the growing peas and love, man.
Q.
What do farmers use to create crop circles?
A. A Protractor.
Texas
Farm House Point to Ponder: If it's chili inside, should
you turnip the heat?
My
wife's a water sign. I'm an earth sign. Together we make
mud.
– Rodney Dangerfield
Rancher
Pick-Up Line: Hey gal, of
all the beautiful faces out there, I just can't get pastures.
|
Q.
What do you get if you cross a robot and a tractor?
A. A Trans-farmer!
Q.
Why was the farmer so teffified by his pumpkins?
A. Because after he watered the seeds, they grew some
and then grew some more!
Did
you hear about the farmer who tried to save money by inventing
a pig-powered tractor? He had to scrap the idea because
every time he turned a corner, the tires squealed.
I
tried to navigate the farmer's field, but it was a maize!
Pick
Up a Farmer Line: Hey big guy, if you were a tractor
and I was a plow, I'd definitely hook up with you. |
