Q. Which kind of motorcycle did the funny stand-up comedian drive?
A. A Yamaha-ha-ha.

Q. Why is a motorcycle better than a woman?
A. You don't have to take a shower before riding your Harley.

Q. What is the difference between a religious revival and a biker rally?
A. At the religious revival they say "Stand up for Jesus," and at a biker rally they say, "Sit down for Christ's sake."

Q. Why is a Harley better than a girlfriend?
A. Motorcycles don't care if you check out other motorcycles.

Q. What do Cowlorado cattle drive when the car is broken?
A. A COWasaki MOOtorcycle.

Q. Which kind of motorcycle does a Jewish biker drive?
A. Yamaka.

Q. What did the bike mechanic get when he crossed a motorcycle and a donkey?
A. A Yam-Hee-Haw.

Q. How are motorcycles like wives?
A. If she ain't yours, don't touch her!

Q. Why aren't motorcycles allowed into the carpool?
A. 'Cause they don't have trunks!

Q. How can you spot a happy fair-weather motorcyclist?
A. You can see the bugs in his teeth!

Q. Why is a Harley better than a wife?
A. Motorcycles don't insult you if you're a bad rider.

Fatally Funny Biker Fact of the Day: One motorcycle will last you a lifetime, if you ride it fast enough...

Q. Why wouldn't the conservative investment banker dress in a white T-shirt, jeans, and black leather jacket while riding his motorcycle?
A. Because that sounded too much like a Fonzi scheme to him.

Q. Why didn't the big, burly, all-American biker buy a Harley Davidson?
A. Because he couldn't afford all the T-shirts.

Pick-Up a Biker Line: Hey there Harleigh, is that your kickstand, or are you just happy to see me?

Q. How is riding a chopper like having sex without a condom?
A. It feels great at the time, but it's really bad if you make a mistake.

Q. Why is a Harley better than a woman?
A. Motorcycles don't mind if it's only a short ride.

Q. How do Harley riders greet their loved ones?
A. With hogs and kisses.

Q. What sort of establishment routinely has a bunch of hogs outside?
A. A biker bar!

Q. What did the pirate's motorcycle say when it rowed on into the biker bar?
A. Rum, rum, rum, rum, rum, rum!

Q. Why is riding your motorcycle better than a woman?
A. You and your motorcycle both arrive at the same time.

Q. Why are cars better than motorcycles on long rides?
A. 'Cause bikes are two tired.

Q. Why did the old bike decline an invitation to ride in a motorcycle club rally?
A. 'Cause he was simply two tired.

Biker Bar Pick-Up Line: Hey big momma, I'd really like to see all of your tattoos.

Q. What does the biker acronym HOG acturally stand for?
A. Heavyset Old Guy.

Q. Why do serious bikers chrome so many of their motorcycle's parts?
A. It makes them easier to spot on the side of the road.

Q. Why is your dirt bike better than your wife?
A. Your motorcycle always feels like going for a bumpy ride.

Q. Why is a motorcycle better than a wife?
A. You can kiick your motorcycle to wake it up. OUCH!

Q. What happened to the bad-to-the-bone biker who found himself cruising down the road to Hell?
A. After he drove over the pothole to Hell, he had to call roadside assistance from Hell. OUCH!

Q. Why is a Harley Davidson better than a girlfriend?
A. You can ride a motorcycle any time of the month.

Q. What is the difference between the rough biker's Harley and his vacuum cleaner?
A. The position of the dirt bag.

Q. Why is a motorcycle better than a woman?
A. Motorcycles don't mind if you take another bike for a test drive.

Q. What did it say on the back of the redneck biker's T-Shirt?
A. If you can read this, my bitch done fell off!

Q. What do bikers call a Harley without tires?
A. A groundHOG.

Q. When did the novice biker discover that adrenaline is actually brown?
A. Only after he bought his first Harley Davidson. Oh Shit!

Q. Why did the funeral parlor guy ride his motorcycle way below the speed limit?
A. Because he's an undertaker, not an over taker.

Biker Bar Hookup Line: Hey girly, wanna take my chopper for a quick spin up your neighborhood?

Q. What do you call a vicar riding a Harley Davidson motorcycle?
A. Rev.

Q. What is the slogan of the skeleton biker gang?
A. Bone to be wild.

Q. Whio did The Fonz call when his motorcycle broke down on his way to Arnold's?
A. Triple Ayyy.

Q. Which big thug tosses motorcycles around in the biker bar parking lot?
A. Hurly Davidson.

Q. What do a Harley owned by a lawyer and a porcupine have in common?
A. Both have pricks on them.

Q. How can you tell a biker just enjoyed a quick ride through Florida?
A. By all the bugs clinging onto his beard!

Q. How do Jedi biker hold their motorcycle tires in place?
A. They use The Fork.

Q. How are the southern biker guy's Harley and his good ol' dog alike?
A. Both like to gor for rides in the back of his pickup truck.

Q. Who unexpectedly showed up at the Yamaha biker bar?
A. Sue Zuki.

Biker Bar Chat Up Line: Hey baby, if you go biking with me, I promise I won't brake your heart.

Q. What is the most dangerous part on a custom chopped motorcycle?
A. The nut that connects the seat to the handlebars.

Q. What did the ex-biker say about the Harley that kept running him over?
A. It was a vicous cycle!

Q. Why do motorcycles get sad and despondent while shifting gears?
A. Because its clutch is depressed...

Q. Why is a motorcycle better than some marriages?
A. Motorcycles last longer.

Q. Why is a motorcycle better than a woman?
A. Motorcycle curves never sag.

Q. When do horny biker gnomes ride Vespas?
A. When they're trolling for a date in Rome.

Q. What kind of noise did the motorcycle wheel make?
A. It spoke.

Hot Biker Comedy Line of the Day: No I'm not a Hell's Angel, but I am punny as hell.

Q. What does revisionist lore call the ancient motorcycle gang of bisexual Norse rulers?
A. The Bikings.

Biker Chat Up Line: Yo momma, if you were my girlfriend, I'd never get two tired of you.

Q. What should you do if your dog keeps chasing people riding a motorcycle?
A. Take the keys away from him...

Q. What happened after the biker's date, Ruth, fell off the hog high up on top of I70 on Loveland Pass?
A. He rode back down to Denver Ruthlessly.

Q. What were the two blonde biker chicks fighting about on the motorcycle?
A. Over which one would get the window seat, duh!

Q. What did the biker dude say about having sex with his girlfriend on the back of a motorcycle?
A. What a Triumph!

Q. Why are there no skinny bikers?
A. 'Cause they all get blown off their motorcycles when they go faster than 35 MPH.

Biker Gang Hookup Line: Hey toots, I wheelie want to get to know you better.

Q. Why do the Hell's Angels wear black?
A. Because there isn't anything darker.

Pick-Up a Biker Line: Hey Harleigh, wanna put on some black leather and burn a little rubber?

Motorcycle Enthusiaist Point to Ponder: When a macho guy drives an extremely noisy bike, is he compensating for a really quiet penis?

Q. Why is a motorcycle better than a woman?
A. Motorcycles don't care about how many other dirt bikes you've ridden.

Q. What do riding a big motorcycle and the government have in common?
A. Once you have a lot of power, you cannot go back.

Q. What do bikers really eat up during the hot summer?
A. Pop-cycles.

Q What do you call a criminal who violently steals light two-wheeled vehicles?
A. A scooter looter.

Q. Which biker gang do biker doctors and EMTs belong to?
A. Health Angels.

Q. What do you call a big motorcycle that doesn't stay in its lane?
A. A road hog.

Q. Why was the urban scooter crying?
A. Because it hated being half motorcycle and half bicycle.

Q. Which Internet browser do motorcycle enthusiaists prefer?
A. Google Chrome.

Q. Which part of a motorcycle is the most musical?
A. The drum brake.

Q. How do you stop a renegade biker on horseback?
A. Unplug the carousel.

Q. How did the old dirt biker die?
A. He bit the dust.

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