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From the original Painful Puns archive.

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Q. What does a French chef give his wife on Valentine's Day? A. A hug and a quiche!

What does a French chef give his wife on Valentine's Day

Chimp Chef Asks: What happens when you fall in love with a French chef? A. you get buttered up!

Chimp Chef Asks: What happens when you fall in love with a French chef

One day, you're the best thing since sliced bread. The next, you're toast!

One day, you're the best thing since sliced bread

Q. What was teh transvestite rooster's stage name? A. Dawn!

What was teh transvestite rooster's stage name

Q. Why did this chicken cross the road? A. Because she's an independent female flightless bird!

Why did this chicken cross the road

Q. What's the difference between meat and a chicken? A. If you beat your chicken, it will die!

What's the difference between meat and a chicken

Q. Why did the horny rooster go to KFC? A. He heard there's chicken meet up there!

Why did the horny rooster go to KFC

Q. How does a rooster kiss his girlfriend? A. With his pecker!

How does a rooster kiss his girlfriend

Q. Why did a rooster go to KFC? A. He wanted to see a chicken strip!

Why did a rooster go to KFC

You might be from Colorado if you plan all your dinner dates at dog-friendly restaurants!

You might be from Colorado if you plan all your dinner dates at dog-friendly restaurants

After Colorado legalized cannabis, my grandpa asked me to download Rocky Mountain High!

After Colorado legalized cannabis, my grandpa asked me to download Rocky Mountain High

You might be from Colorado if you highly recomment the Rocky Mountain Oysters to your visiting in-laws!

You might be from Colorado if you highly recomment the Rocky Mountain Oysters to your visiting in-laws