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McCoy Says: Doctor's orders, Jim. Be a vulcan in the streets and a Klingon in the sheets!
Why did the chicken cross the road? To boldly go where no chicken has gone before! – James T Kirk
Star Trek Humor: Why did the chicken cross the road? Insufficient Information! – Computer

 


Star Trek: The Original Series Jokes & TOS Humor
Ahead Warp Factor 9 to Enterprise humor, Kirk-y puns, and jokes to tickle your funny Bones.

Star Trek Jokes, Spock Humor, Captain Kirk Puns
(Because Star Trek Original Series Jokes Could Never Be Too Mainstream for Trekkies or Trekkers!)
Warning: Proceed at your own risk. Beam Me Up, Scotty! I'm Wearing a Red Shirt!
| Star Trek | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Original Series | 2 | 3 | Next Generation | 2 | 3 |
| Spock | 2 | Enterprise Captains | Ladies of Star Trek | Klingons | The Borg |

Captain Kirk Says: Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes!Red Shirts to Kirk: Yes Sir. We're reddy!Why did the chicken cross the road? Dammin Jim! I'm a doctor, not a farmer! - Bones McCoy

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You learned how to successfully pick up women by studying Captain Kirk.

Q. Why is James T. Kirk still the best Star Trek captain of all time?
A. Captain Kirk once fought a Greek god, and won!

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. You're afraid to wear a red shirt!

Q. Why didn't the Enterprise's red shirt chicken cross the road?
A. She had a few lines in upcoming episodes.

Q. Which red shirt is a good loser?
A. The junior officer playing 3-D chess with his captain.

Q. Why did the skeleton chicken cross the Star Trek road?
A. She heard Bones McCoy was on the other side!

When Dr. McCoy finished his examination of Scotty, he said, "I can't find any reason for your stomach pains. Frankly, I think it's due to drinking." Mr. Scott replied, "In that case, I'll come back when you're sober."

Spock Says: Star Trek Memes Are Illogical!Have you read the book, Chekov: The Navigator? It's byy: I. KiptinQ. What happened when Yeoman Rand said there was a peephole in her cabin door? A. Captain Kirk promised t look into it!

Q. What does Mr. Spock think about all this lively Vulcan humor?
A. I think it's a joke form, Jim, but not as we know it.

Q. How does a Vulcan make their favorite beverage?
A. With a T'Bag!

Mr. Spock: "A syzygy is three heavenly bodies lined up in a row. Give me an example."
Chekov: "Mudd's Women!"

Mr. Spock: "What is the formula for PI?"
Chekov: "Err, apple or cherry, sir?"

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your blow-up doll looks like Yeoman Janice Rand.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. You know Yeoman Rand's cabin number.

Q. Why did Captain Kirk visit the Romulan loo? A. To boldly go where no man has gone before!McCoy Says: Yes, Klingons do work out at the He's Dead Gym!Spock: Sniveling is illogical. Dr. Smith: Unhand me, you mechanical moron!

And, To Boldly Go Watch Star Trek Reruns!

Q. Why did Lieutenant Uhuru look so shocked?
A. Because William Shat-Near Her.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your dog's name is Bones.

Q. Why did the skeleton chicken cross the Star Trek road?
A. She heard Bones McCoy was on the other side!

Q. What would Mr. Spock say to Dr. Smith?
A. I am NOT Dr. Spock!

Q. What did Spock say when he finally got the joke's punch line?
A. Wanting is a better feeling than having.

Q. What does Doctor McCoy say before each new mission? Bones Voyage!Captain Kirk Says: Boldly Go Watch Star Trek Reruns!Why did the chicken cross the road? Obviously, it was the logical thing to do! – Mr Spock

Q. What did Dr. McCoy mumble when he finally went through the time portal gate on Guardian of Forever?
A. "You're all the same. In one era and out the other."

Doctor McCoy: Do you serve crabs here?
Enterprise mess officer: Yes sir. Please have a seat.

McCoy to Captain Kirk: "Should we have a friendly game of cards?" Kirk: "No, let's play poker."

Captain Kirk seldoms laughs, but when he does, it involves Romulan ale.

Q. How can you tell who's a fan of Star Trek TOS and Ancient Aliens?
A. They own a vacation home in Roswell.

Q. Why did the Vulcan rooster cross the road?
A. Because there were Pon Farr chickens on the other side!

Q. Why did the red shirt cross the road?
A. He heard there were a lot of chicks on the other side.

| Sci-Fi Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | Dr Who | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
| Star Trek
| 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Spock | 2 | TOS | 2 | 3 | TNG | 2 | 3 | Klingon | Borg |
| Star Wars | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Lost in Space | Aliens | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Sci Road | 2 | Moon Cow |

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