Q. How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Two, but it's cramped!   PainfulPuns.com - Pet Puns + Funny Birds, Cats, Dogs = Pet Peeves

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Q. What did the cat say after he lost all his money? A. I'm Paw!
Q. What do you call a rabbit with fleas? A. Bugs Bunny

 


Funny Pet Jokes, Animal Puns, Silly Pet Peeves
Cuddle up to funny animal jokes, cute house pet humor, and furry catty puns.

Pet Puns, Animal Humor, Cute Pet Jokes
(Because Pet Par
ents with a Great Sense of Humor and Lots of Love Could Never Be Too Mainstream!)
Warning: Please Don't Febreeze the Animals. Stinking funny pet jokes and purr-dy silly pet puns ahead.
| Pet Animal Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Bird | Cat | Dog | Fish | Exotic Pets | Pet Rodent |
| Wildly Funny Animal Jokes | Monkey | Farm Animal Jokes | Chicken | Horse |


Q. What is the difference between a frog and a cat? A. A frog croaks all the time, a cat only nine times.Q. How are a counterfeit coin and a crazy rabbit alike? A. One is bad money and the other is mad bunny.Q. Why don't oysters donate to charity? A. Because they're shellfish.

Q. What do you call a cat that just ate a pet duck?
A. A duck-filled platy puss.

Q. Why is it so hard for leopards to escape from the zoo?
A. Because they're always spotted.

Q. What is the difference between a healthy pet rabbit and an odd one?
A. One is a fit bunny and the other is a bit funny.

Q. What kind of music do urban rabbits prefer?
A. Hip Hop.

Q. How do shellfish get to the hospital?
A. In a clam-bulance!

Q. What do you get when you cross an owl and an oyster?
A. Pearls of Wisdom.

Q. What's the difference between an ornithologist and a stutterer? One is a bird watcher, and the other's a word botcher.A friend annoys me with bad puns, but toucan play at that game!Q. What do you get if you cross an electric eel and a sponge? A. A shock absorber.

Q. What do you get if you cross a parrot with a woodpecker?
A. A bird that talks in morse code.

Q. Why couldn't anybody find the rare pet bird that escaped?
A. It was in da skies!

Q. How many pet birds does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. Toucan do it.

Q. What do pet birds like to watch on television?
A. Duck-umentaries.

Q. What do you get if you cross a big fish with a power line?
A. An electric shark!

Q. What do you get when you cross an owl and an oyster?
A. Pearls of Wisdom.

Q. If a seagull flies over the sea, what flies over the bay? A. A Bagel!Q. What is it called when a female sheep flips around? A. A Ewe TurnQ. How Did the Piglet with Laryngitis Feel? A. He was a little disgruntled!

Q. What kind of birds spend a lot of time on their knees?
A. Birds of Prey.

Q. What do you call a duck on drugs?
A. A quack head.

Q. Which shampoo do pet birds prefer?
A. Dove.

Q. What do you call a pet lamb who likes to tell jokes?
A. A Ewe-morist.

Q. What kind of car does a sheep drive?
A. A Lamborghini.

Q. What does an ambitious sheep want?
A. To wool the world.

Q. What do you call a pig that's wrong?
A. Mistaken Bacon.

Q. What is a great Halloween costume for your pet pig?
A. Frankenswine!

Q. What do good little pet piglets do after school?
A. Their ham work.

Sir Lancelot had a bad dream about his horse. It was a knight mare.How Do You Get a Mouse to Smile? Say: "Cheese"Animal Pun: The rodent club finished drafting a constitution, but it has yet to be ratified.

Q. What did one horse say to another?
A. The face looks familiar, but I don't remember the mane.

Did you hear about the runaway horse? It's a terrible tale of whoa.

Q. Why was the mouse afraid of water?
A. Catfish.

Q. What kind of cheese do pet rodents prefer?
A. Mouserella!

Q. What mouse was a Roman emperor?
A. Julius Cheeser.

Q. How did the pet mouse feel after taking a shower?
A. Squeaky clean.

| Pet Animal Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Bird | Cat | Dog | Fish | Exotic Pets | Pet Rodent |
| Wildly Funny Animal Jokes | Monkey | Farm Animal Jokes | Chicken | Horse |


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You've lasted this far, so here's even more horsing around,
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| Sci-Fi Funnies | Seasonally Silly Puns | Sports Jokes | High Tech Puns | Weed is Funny! |

Pot Puns, Weed Jokes, Green Grow-ners! Funny Riddles, Punny Answers! Painful Puns, Punny Funs, Ouch!
Animal Puns, Wildlife Humor Clucking Funny Farm Animal Puns Garden Puns, Green Groaners

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