Two podiatrists became arch enemies.   PainfulPuns.com - Job Jokes, Funny Occupations, Work Whoas?

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Painful Puns & On The Job Jokes
Pick your new position from our job jokes, work humor, and occupational hazards!

Painful Puns, Job Jokes, Work Riddles
(Because NOT Funny Jobs That Don't Pay Well Are Too Mainstream)
Warning: Proceed at your own risk. Take a break, but remember cameras are on.
On the Job Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5
| 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |

Optometrists live long because they dilate.Chef Pun: Got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.Q. What do you get if you cross an elephant and a skin doctor? A. Pachydermatologist

Q. What was the lens's excuse to the cop?
A. I've been framed.

Q. Why was the baker in a panic?
A. Because he was in a loaf or death situation.

Q. What do you get if you cross an elephant and a rhino?
A. Eleph-I-no (hell if I know)

Butchers link sausage to make ends meet.A lawyer asked his dentist ... for a retainer.Whoever served the wine at the banquet did a pour job.

Q. What do you call a cow with no front legs?
A. Lean Beef.

But it wasn't enough to really sink his teeth into.

My dog is trained to bring me red wine. He's a Bordeaux collie.

Old hardware engineers never die, they just cache in their chips.A magician was driving down the road, then he turned into a driveway.Potty Humor: Urologists Know How to Go with the Flow!

Q. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. None. It's a hardware problem.

Q. Did you hear about the perverted magician?
A. He pulled his top hat out of a rabbit.

Q. Did you hear about the angry magician?
A. He pulled his hare out.

Q. What do you call a country where everyone is pissed?
A. Urination.

Are you a chemist? 'Cause I want to do you on a table periodically!Did you hear about the optician? Two glasses, and he made a spectacle of himself.Why do gnomes make bad rappers? Gnome Rhyme, Ignor Reason!

Dr. Gnome Pick Up Line: Basic elements, all laid out, what coud be more gnormal?

Doctor, doctor, I need glasses!

Yes, you certainly do. This is a barber shop.

Plus, their tiny vocal chords can't be heard by dwarves and leprechauns.
Q. How do you make a cello sound beautiful?
A. Sell it and buy a violin.

On the Job Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |

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