Jokes, Doo-Doo Humor, Funny Poop Puns
out duty-ful stinkers, turdy shat puns, smelly poo-poo humor and crappy
Proceed at Your Own Risk! Malodorous toilet humor, stinky scat jokes,
and pooped out puns ahead.
Turd Jokes, Crappy Puns, Bathroom Humor
('Cause Shitty Toilet Jokes
Could Never Be Too Mainstream and Funny Feces Jokes May
Make You Flush Twice!)
| Turd Jokes and Crap Puns | 2
| Constipation Jokes | Diarrhea
Jokes | Porta Potty Jokes
| Toilet Jokes | Toilet
Paper Jokes | Urine Jokes, Pee
Puns, #1 Humor | Potty Training
| Sewer Humor | Fart
Jokes | Men's Room Jokes | Superhero
Loo LOLs | Sci-Fi Toilet Jokes
| Bath Time Jokes | Lady's
Room Jokes | Animal Poop Puns |
Manure LOLs | Gas
Station Jokes |
your poop in a group" is a childish way of saying "get
your sh*t together," but "gather the pieces of
your feces" says it best. Plus, that confuses E.T.
What did the feces call the lies some turd told him?
A. Poop Fiction!
Why are men's rooms always on the left and ladies' rooms
always on the right?
A. Because no matter what, women are always right, even
when they're full of shit.
What kind of humor do toilets enjoy most often?
A. Shitty jokes.
flies are sitting on a pile of poop. One fly farts, and
the other fly yells, "Hey, I'm trying to eat here!"
What do you call it when you get in your car, and then realize
you need to use the bathroom?
A. A turd of events.
What kind of jokes do toilets really eat up?
A. Crappy puns.
When shouldn't you tell a crappy joke?
A. If it's just too corny.
What is the worst thing about being constipated?
A. Nobody gives a shit that you can't!
How did the proctologist refer to his now ex-wife?
What kind of car does a protologist drive?
A. A BMW.
What happens if the power goes off while you're in the bathroom?
A. You can't see shit.
What happens if your doctor diagnoses you with both anxiety
A. You worry shitless.
farted at work today. They called in the plumbers to look
for a leak in the sewage system.
What is the busiest time in public restrooms?
A. Poo Thirty!
What do you call a fart in German?
How do you keep a dog from pooping in your front yard?
A. Keep him in the backyard!
new boss has designated bathroom break times for all the
employess. Now it's my turn. I don't need this shit!
of the Day: Constipation can be a serious problem. No
What do you call a dog that eats another dog's feces?
A. Pooper scooper.
On a freezing cold day, what does your dog call the treats
he made for you?
Have you seen that new movie Constipated?
A. It hasn't come out yet.
What happens after you spray orange-scented air freshener
in your bathroom?
A. Then it smells like shitrus.
Pick-Up Line: My love for you
is just explosive diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
What do you call a 12-inch turd?
A. A foot stool!
How do you get the bathroom unlocked in a hurry?
A. Use a doo-key!
Point to Ponder: Are people who constantly talk about constipation
just full of crap?
Why should you always tip the bathroom attendant?
A. Because he's certainly seen some shit.
can take the man out of the sewer, but you can't take the
sewer out of the man. – Trixie Norton
What does a hipster get if he poops in his skinny jeans?
Which human turds are recorded in history?
How is working in a dead end job just like constipation?
A. Because you just don't give a shit!
bats were just hanging out when one asks the other,
"Do you remember your worst day last year?" Second
bat replies, "Yeah, the day I had diarrhea."
How does a fart refer to the love of his brief life?
you hear the joke about the turd? Never mind, it really
Pun of the Day: Constipation jokes may not be your favorite,
but they're certainly a solid number two.
Why do cherry trees stink?
A. Because George Washington cut one!
What do you call an eskimo's diarrhea?
A. A poopsicle.
Why are turds always tired?
A. Because they're pooped out!
Why did the crappy policeman become a paleontologist?
A. Because he was a real coprolite.
What is so shitty about constipation?
Why do farts smell?
A. For the benefit of the hearing impared.
else is glad that Tootsday and Turdsday are two days apart?
What does a religious man say to the toilet before he flushes?
A. Holy Shit.
Why did the lawyer ask the witness if he had to go to the
A. Because his testimony was full of crap.
Why is animal poop sexy?
A. Because the birds and bees doo it.
was going to tell you a poop joke, but it's a real stinker.
What do you call a tiny arachnid with a nasty case of diarrhea?
A. An itsy shitsy spider.
What did the turd say to the fart?
A. That last one really blew me away!
What did diarrhea say to poop?
A. Wow, you really are in shape!
Is eating cow patties the miracle cure for human digestive
A. No. It's just a load of bullshit.
man accidentally farts loudly at a party. Another man growls,
"How dare you fart before my sister!" The farter
replies, "Sorry, I didn't know it was her turn."
Why should you never mess with a janitor who is cleaning
a clogged bathroom?
A. Because when they're plunging a toilet, shit goes down.
Which part of a Chicago trilogy is a real stinker?
A. Da Turd Part.
What time does a rooster wake up and visit the outhouse?
A. At the crap of dawn.
Turd Jokes and Crap Puns | 2
| Constipation Jokes and Proctologist
Puns | Diarrhea Jokes
Point to Ponder: If pooping is the call of nature, then
is a fart a missed call?
pizzas were manhole covers, the sewer would be paradise.
– Ed Norton
What did the constipated guy say to the stubborn stool?
A. You may think you're the shit, but to me you're just
a turd waiting to be flushed.
Joke of the Day: Constipation is no laughing matter.
you're up hootin' with the owls and you need to move your
bowels, is the moment magical? I stink not!
What is another name for the handicapped stall in the restroom?
A. A handicrapped zone.
What is brown and sounds like a bell?
What did the priest say before he flushed the toilet?
A. Holy Crap!
What do you call it when you can't open the door to the
A. Pooper stupid.
What kind of jokes do bidets like best?
A. Crappy humor.
How do you know the pills you took for constipation are
A. Because they didn't do shit!
What did the doctor say about using medical marijuana for
A. He said, "Shit, or get off the pot."
are the only folks who can feel good about being sh*tty!
Why should you always hope a liar does blow up?
A. 'Cause he's full of shit!
Why do Denver Broncos fart?
A. Because they can't acheive full horse power without gas!
Which event do gamey toilets bet on every year?
A. The Pooper Bowl.
Where does hot sh*t stay in downtown Denver?
A. The Brown Palace.
What did the guy say to the blonde when he playfully slapped
A. Hi, Poopsie!
What kinds of dogs did the superstitious guy get to prevent
A. A Shih Tzu and a Poodle.
What is it called when a redneck shoots a bucket of cow
A. A crap shoot.
| Toilet Jokes | 2
| Toilet Paper Jokes and TP Puns
| Urine Jokes, Pee Puns, and #1 Humor
| Shower Jokes, Bath Puns | Potty
Trained Puns | Porta Potty
Jokes and Outhouse Puns |
| Men's Room Jokes | Ladies
Room Humor | Butt Jokes | Underwear
Laughs | Yellow Jokes |
| Fart Jokes and Funny Flatulence
| Gas Station Jokes | Smelly
Jokes, Stinking Funny Puns |
| Plumber Jokes and Sewer Humor
| Superhero Loo | 2
| Sci-Fi Toilet Jokes | Janitor
| Animal Poop Puns |
Fertilizer Jokes, Garden Manure Humor, and Crappy Gnome Puns
| Bathroom Jokes, Toilet Humor, Potty Puns,
Crappy Jokes | 2 | 3
| 4 | 5
| 6 | 7
| 8 | 9
| 10 |
You're not crapped out, so
here's more duty-ful
laughter, shitty humor,
dung funny jokes, and poopy
painful puns that really do stink:
Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...
Beer Jokes | Blonde
Jokes | Butt Jokes | Colorado
Jokes | E.T. Alien Jokes | Explosion
Jokes | Family Jokes |
| Hot Dog Puns | Money
LOLs | Music Humor | Pig
Jokes | Police Puns | Scary
Monster Jokes | Sci-Fi Jokes |
| Seasonal Puns | Sports
Jokes | Superhero Jokes | Tex-Mex
Puns | Time Jokes | Travel
Jokes | TV Show Jokes |
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